Don't Be Afraid (film #6 on Campy Classroom Classics, Vol. 2 (Something Weird, 2000). Also, extra on Monsters Crash the Pajama Party Spook Show Spectacular DVD (Something Weird, 2001). Also available for download on Open Video Project. Also available for download on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Educational]
Billy is afraid of the dark until his mom gives him a long lecture about real fears vs. imaginary fears, giving lots of examples such as Mom being afraid of a grease fire (real), Kathy being afraid of dogs (imaginary), Billy being afraid to climb up a drainpipe to retrieve a ball (real) and Frank hiding in the basement out of fear of his parents' reaction to his bad report card (imaginary). This film takes place in a charming imaginary world where the worst dangers are grease fires and high places, dogs are friendly creatures that never bite and definitely don't have rabies, and a child with a bad report card hides from his parents because of a terrible misunderstanding, not because of any real fear of abuse by them (the film does admit that the parents "might have been pushing Frank too hard" but the whole thing is resolved in the end and everybody's happy). Note to certain clueless people: This was not the world of the 1950s. This world never existed. There was plenty to be afraid of in the 1950s. Remember the Cold War, for starters? Check out some of the stuff in the Military & Propaganda category if you don't know what I'm talking about.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Attack of the LEGOs: Revenge of the Order of Darkness (available on Brickfilms). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]
This lengthy, elaborate Brickfilm could use some help in the storytelling department. It has a basic action plot of Our Ninja Hero fighting the Order of Darkness, an evil army that threatens to take over the world. There are lots of jokes, parody elements, and references bandied about. Some of them work, many don’t. Still, there are enough fun moments and concepts to make this worth watching, such as the armaments dealer that sells entire armies and weapons of mass destruction through its drive-through window, and the parody movie posters in the Legoland movie theater lobby. And yes, there’s a credit cookie sequence at the end.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
First American in Space (downloaded from the Featured Clip Archive of WPA Film Library). [Category: News]
Documentary footage of the first American manned space flight of Alan Shepard. This has some historical value, but no real surprises.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.
Atomic Weapons Tests: Trinity Through Buster-Jangle (downloaded from Open Source Movies). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
This early-50s government film documents the atomic testing program from the first explosion at Trinity site to the Buster-Jangle tests, which included the first underground tests. The tests and the rationale behind them are explained in great detail, which gets rather dry after a bit. But there are some interesting visuals, such as some striking animations and the expected explosions. At times, the audio cuts out, due to its being “sanitized” (their word, not mine) by the government to remove all still-classified information, though this is infrequent and not too intrusive. This film has lots of historical value in documenting the early atomic testing program, as well as being fairly interesting to watch.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Feeding the Baby ["Repas de Bebe"] (film #2 on The Movies Begin, Volume Two: The European Pioneers (Kino Video, 1994). Also, film #4 on Pioneers of the French Cinema (Hollywood's Attic, 1996)). [Category: Early Film & TV]
A couple enjoys feeding their baby. Slightly more interesting if you consider that most likely everybody in it, including the baby, is dead now. Probably one of the first home movies. An 1895 Lumiere film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: **.
Foreign Fire Departments (downloaded from Prelinger Archive). [Category: Industrial]
This 30s firefighting film has lots of stuff about the Boston fire department, some of it I’m sure I’ve seen before, but I’ll press on in the assumption that at least some of this is new. Most of the first half features demonstrations of lots of different firefighting equipment, including a pipe that blows smoke out of cellars. The second half features footage of various fires, most of which I know I’ve seen in other Stillman films, especially the footage from Yokohama. Not much new to see here, actually, unless you’re a firefighting completist.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.
Daddy (downloaded from Bedazzled). [Category: Hollywood]
Sultry Julie London sings to her sugar daddy about all the finer things in life he’d better give her, and, in case he doesn’t get the message, she has scantily-clad models show him all the swag she expects. This is much livelier and more convincing than the soundie version of this song, making it more fun.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ***.
Courtesy for Beginners (available on A/V Geeks. Also available for download from Google Video). [Category: Educational]
This 60s manners film for gradeschoolers is pretty campy, but it’s also so utterly charming that you don’t want to be too hard on it. Most fun is a scene of kids practicing greetings by speaking into a tape recorder. They do the greetings in a stilted, yet realistic (for kids) fashion, then make faces when they hear their voices played back. Then they have other kids respond politely to the recorded greetings, and this is also a lot of fun. OK, it’s important to teach kids manners, and the basic civility taught in this film is reasonable, but it’s hard not to start giggling at the earnestness portrayed here, while still being swayed by its charm. This is a late-60s Coronet film, with all of the Coronet earnest charm, which wouldn’t be around for much longer, so there’s a wistfulness about this film, too.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Charles E. Hughes Speaking During Campaign, Duquense, PA, 1916 (downloaded from Theodore Roosevelt). [Category: Early Film & TV]
Justice Hughes gives a campaign speech on behalf of TR to steelworkers in Pennsylvania. This kind of film was one kind that was vastly improved once sound was invented. Still, this has a bit of historical interest. A 1916 Universal film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.
Hot Spot (film #27 on The Complete Uncensored Private SNAFU DVD (Image Entertainment, 1999)). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
This is the polar opposite to The Aleutians––Isles of Enchantment (Oh Brother!). The Devil himself narrates this tribute to the GIs slogging their way through hot-as-Hades Iran, delivering Lend-Lease supplies to Russia. Private SNAFU only makes cameo appearances in a few of the gags. A slightly weird moment is when we see the Devil taking salt tablets, but otherwise this is ordinary.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Abba Commercials (available on Vintage Ads. Also available on You Tube). [Category: Commercial]
This is a set of 5 British commercials for National, a small appliance company, that were done by the Europop group Abba. In all of them, they sing a jingle for National to the tune of “Fernando.” Since I never liked that song, I think this is an improvement. And there’s something so natural about Abba doing commercials somehow.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
The Cool Ones Trailer (downloaded from Bedazzled). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]
Manic 60s movie trailer that tries so hard to be cool that it fails miserably. For that reason only, it should be preserved for all time. But if that wasn’t enough, it also features a clip from Mrs. Miller! A must.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: *****+. Overall Rating: *****.
Down Mobile Way (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Public Service]
This Department of the Interior film from the 30s tells us all about the state parks being built by the CCC near Mobile, Alabama. Lots of scenes of the CCC at work are shown, some with interesting old-time technology, such as steam engines. The film is mildly racist in its portrayal of African Americans, such as referring to the black CCC members as “Negro boys.” Other than that, this film is pretty straightforward, though it does have historical interest.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Attack of the Flesh-Eating Subterranean Bog Monster from the Center of the Earth and Beyond the Moon: Apocalyptic Revenge (downloaded from Open Source Movies). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]
This parody of 50s sci-fi monster movies is pretty amusing, in an amateurish sort of way. It features a dorky teen couple, a mad scientist named the Professor, and a monster that looks like it was created at Muppet Labs. Silliness ensues for a little over 8 minutes, then it ends abruptly. This may not be Hollywood quality, but I don’t want to discourage people with camcorders from creating this kind of fun, so I’m giving it a high rating.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Exploration of the Planets (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: News]
This NASA film from the early 70s goes over the series of unmanned space flights that were planned to explore all the planets of the solar system. For the most part, these flights fulfilled their promise, as evidenced by how much more we know about the planets now than we did when this film was made. This gives the film quite a bit of historical value. It’s all pretty straightforward and unsurprising, but not boring either, making this worthwhile viewing for those interested in the history of planetary exploration.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
I Can’t Give You Anything but Love (downloaded from Prelinger Archive). [Category: Hollywood]
A pretty woman sings “I Can’t Give You Anything but Love” (Bay-Be!! You remember how it goes…) and a couple of dorky couples dance in the kind of nightclub floor show they just don’t do today. A charming soundie from the 40s.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Atomic Test (downloaded from Open Source Movies). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
This is actually clips from two different films: Excavating with Nuclear Explosives and Plowshare. We see a number of underground explosions as narrators tell us about plans to use nukes for excavating purposes. This is a scary concept––I hate to think of what the radiation would do to the soil. This is pretty short, but it has some interesting-looking explosions on it.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Food for America (available for download from Open Video Project. Also available for download from Prelinger Archive). [Category: Industrial]
This 50s film tells you way more than you want to know about the Beatrice Foods Company, using one of the hokiest framing devices ever. Mrs. Hargraves, an excessively polite housewife, is assigned by her church women’s group to do a paper on the food industry. Obviously she’s seen and taken to heart the film How to Prepare a Class Report, because she gets the idea off of a milk bottle to visit the local Meadow Gold plant and then immerses herself in a truly obsessive research project, by using her family’s vacation to visit darn near every Beatrice foods plant in the country. At every plant, including corporate headquarters, she is warmly welcomed by the man in charge, and they exchange very stilted conversation about the company after she goes on the standard factory tours. The factory tour footage is pretty interesting, there are some fun scenes of 50s food packages, and, of course, I enjoyed the ice cream plant footage a lot. But boy, does this film go on and on. They even give a detailed explanation of company finances, which probably interested the firm’s stockholders but nobody else. And the film’s creaky organ soundtrack and stilted acting lend an amateurish air to the proceedings that makes you yearn for Jam Handy after awhile. Still, this is a prime example of the company profile film, giving it historical interest, as well as the occasional campy moment.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.
Disputes and Rules (film #4 on Campy Classroom Classics, Vol. 4 DVD (Something Weird, 2004)). [Category: Educational]
This Coronet film aimed at grade-schoolers goes over different ways to settle disputes, including compromising, following rules, getting the facts, and voting. These ideas actually have some merit, making this one of the more reasonable and believable Coronet social guidance films. I particularly like the way the film explains that many rules are designed to help avoid disputes, which is a better reason for following rules than put forth by many social guidance films. The kids’ performances are charmingly dorky and stilted, true to Coronet form. The film does have one rather strange aspect: all the outdoor scenes have no synchronized sound, with the narrator telling us what the kids are arguing about, while the indoor scenes allow the kids to talk for themselves. Perhaps there was a technical reason for this, but it comes off looking like they were reluctant to let us hear the kids’ outdoor arguments. All in all, though, this is one of the more charming and believable Coronet films.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Customers Wanted (available for download on Feature Films. Also, film #44 on 50 Cartoon Classics DVD. Also, film #9 on Disc #1 of 100 Cartoon Classics DVD Megapack (Treeline Films, 2004). Also, film #9 on Disc #4 of 150 Cartoon Classics DVD Megapack (Mill Creek Entertainment, 2005)). [Category: Hollywood]
Popeye and Bluto operate competing penny arcades and get into a fight over a customer, who just happens to be Wimpy. This gives them the opportunity to show scenes from previous Popeye cartoons on their respective nickelodeons. Naturally, the winner of this competition turns out to be Wimpy. I tend to find cartoons that cannibalize previous ones in the series to be a bit of a rip-off, but this one is pretty fun all the same, featuring as it does some great penny arcade devices, as well as a great ending. Not one of the best Popeyes, but not bad for a retrospective cartoon.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Courtesy at School (available on A/V Geeks. Also available for download from Google Video. Also available on You Tube). [Category: Educational]
Jerry is so hepped up about being the first one on the baseball field that he thoughtlessly knocks the books out of a girl’s hand’s as he brushes by her, and then breaks up a marble game by running through it. Fortunately, though, Jerry’s class is learning about courtesy that day. After getting a rundown on all kinds of rules to follow at school in order to make everyone’s life easier, Jerry reforms and makes himself a bunch of picture signs to remind himself to be courteous. This Cornonet film tells its story entirely through narration, making it less lively than the usual Cornonet fare. Other than a brief scene of a really strange puppet show (no Mr. Bungle, though), this is pretty ordinary.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Charity Ball (downloaded from American Variety Stage. Also available on Edison Film Archive). [Category: Early Film & TV]
An attractive couple do a rather athletic ballroom dance for our entertainment. That’s it, but it gives you an idea of what wowed ‘em in 1897. An 1897 Edison film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.
Blood of Dracula Trailer (available for download on Bedazzled. Also, extra on Track of the Vampire/Nightmare Castle DVD (Madacy Entertainment)). [Category: Commercial]
Mildly campy trailer for the 50s horror flick Blood of Dracula, featuring evil women, black magic, teens, and silly title cards, such as the assertion that “You Will Have Nightmares for a Week!” There’s some mild fun here, but I’ve seen better.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Bend Me, Shape Me (downloaded from Bedazzled). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]
One-hit wonders The American Breed sing, or rather lip-synch, their one hit, “Bend Me, Shape Me,” in this TV clip. The drummer looks like he’s having way too much fun back there. This will bring back those 60s TV-watching memories.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Fat and Lean Wrestling Match (film #15 on Melies the Magician DVD (Facets Video, 2001)). [Category: Early Film & TV]
Now this is what I call wrestling! Really, wouldn't the sport be a lot more interesting if it allowed such things as women turning into men, blasting your opponent to pieces and putting him back together again, or fat guys falling on skinny guys and flattening them as if they had been run over by steamrollers? One of the silliest, and therefore greatest, sports movies ever. A 1900 Melies film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Cradle of the Father of Waters (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Public Service]
This 30s Department of the Interior film profiles the state parks in northeastern Minnesota, particularly Lake Itasca State Park, which contains the headwaters of the Mississippi river. Scenes from their annual pageant are shown, which celebrates the history of the area. Native Americans are very much a part of this story, and their portrayal in the film is somewhat more sympathetic and enlightened than you usually find in 30s films, though not perfect. The film also reports on the improvement projects being done by the CCC. This is a historically interesting film, documenting as it does the development of state parks during the 30s, and it has some interesting scenic and historical images in it.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Attack of the Evil Robotic Turkey from Outer Space (available on Brickfilms). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]
This silly brickfilm features an evil William Shatner, who builds and unleashes a giant robotic turkey to take over the world. Fortunately, a cowboy hero saves the day with a rolled-up newspaper. The voice acting of Shatner is very bad, but that’s appropriate somehow. The best thing about the film is the variety of amusing things in the background, such as the zombie brickfilm the hero was watching when interrupted to battle the turkey, or the “Josef Stalin for Mayor” sign.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Earth Resources Technology Satellite (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: News]
This early-70s NASA film profiles the Earth Resources Technology Satellite, a satellite designed to produce detailed photos of the earth from space. These photos turned out to be very useful for a number of purposes, including charting land use, tracking environmental changes, predicting weather, and establishing geographical boundaries. The uses being discovered are profiled in detail, which makes the film rather dry after a bit, but the images themselves are very striking and beautiful, and that makes things a bit more interesting. The film is also very 70s, with 70s clothing and hairstyles aplenty, plus lots of scenes of antiquated computer technology, which was state-of-the-art at the time.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
The Home Front (available on A/V Geeks. Also available for download on AV Geeks. Also, film #8 on The Complete Uncensored Private SNAFU DVD (Image Entertainment, 1999). Also available on You Tube.) [Category: Military & Propaganda]
SNAFU, stuck in a frozen wasteland, starts complaining that everybody at home has it soft: "They don't even know there's a war on!" Technical Fairy First Class brings out a televisor that shows him just how soft the folks at home have it: Dad builds tanks, Mom plants a Victory Garden, Grandpa welds ships, and his girl has joined the WAC! This is a fairly typical SNAFU with a few good gags and a really weird moment of a horse spreading his own manure on Mom's Victory Garden.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
American Army Women Serving on All Fronts (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
This WWII newsreel shows American women getting planes ready for battle and WACs arriving in Australia. This has some great scenes of women doing all kinds of “men’s work,” documenting their important role in the war effort. Also included are stories about the 5000th flying fortress being built at Boeing and covered with workers’ signatures, the United Newsreel cameraman preparing to document the invasion of Europe, an Italian-American pilot who was decorated for bravery returning to his family in Ohio, and extended footage of the Allied drive north through Italy. This newsreel packs a lot of WWII history into its short length.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.
Flexible Cellar Pipe (downloaded from Prelinger Archive). [Category: Industrial]
This firefighting film from the 30s demonstrates a new kind of hose with an adjustable nozzle that bends in various ways. The firemen demonstrate it gleefully and then we get to see it demonstrated squirting water in an endless series of tests. This should interest firefighters way more than other viewers, though the delight the firemen display with the adjustable nozzle is mildly amusing.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Anti-Superstition Society (downloaded from the Featured Clip Archive of WPA Film Library). [Category: Hollywood]
Silly newsreel story about the Anti-Superstition Society of Chicago defying Friday the 13th by breaking a mirror and awarding John Glenn, the astronaut of the 13th space capsule, a watch that has only 13s on its face. A fun little pocket of weirdness from the early 60s.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Country Goes to the Big City and Learns About Alcohol (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Educational]
Bill is a country boy, but in case that isn’t obvious, he’s dressed in overalls and a straw hat, and the first time you see him, he’s fishing with a homemade pole, just like in countless sentimental illustrations from the 19th century. But Bill lives in the 20th century, so he decides that since he’s 14 already (though from the looks of things, puberty is still a ways down the road for him) he ought to go find out for himself what the gol darned fuss is about the Big City. Along the way, he meets a wino who introduces himself as Mr. Whiskey, complete with whiskey label on his shirt. That’s right, a supernatural visitor, as well as a Mr. Product, that’s a wino––I guess somebody had to do it. Together, they take a bizarre trip on foot to the city, with Bill pointing out various stock footage clips that represent careers he might like to pursue, while Mr. Whiskey puts the kibosh on all of them. Finally, they end up at Mr. Whiskey’s home in the city: an alley replete with other winos. Bill tries to get away, but Mr. Whiskey holds him back. Fortunately, it turns out to be just a dream, and Bill, like Dorothy, vows never to leave home again. If it’s not obvious from the description, this is one hokey and strange film, with laughable moments aplenty and strange implications, such as that city life equals alcoholism, or that alcohol is not allowed on trains, planes, or ships. And it opens up new horizons in the supernatural visitor genre. What’s next, Mr. Crack?Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
The Hut-Sut Song (downloaded from Prelinger Archive). [Category: Hollywood]
Four guys in a rooming house sing “The Hut-Sut Song” so repeatedly and annoyingly that the other boarders sensibly have them carted away to the loony bin. But since when has music been sensible? Is that the head psychiatrists and the orderlies I see singing “The Hut-Sut Song”? This soundie is essential.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.
Charge of Boer Cavalry No. 2 (downloaded from Edison Film Archive). [Category: Early Film & TV]
Another sword-waving cavalry charge, and this time it looks like the cameraman almost got run over, though the illusion is ruined by having the horses stop and mill around right in front of the camera, and by the one straggler who gets halfway there and just gives up. Doesn’t make the Boers look too good, frankly. A 1900 Edison film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ***.
Blood Freak Trailer (extra on Blood Freak DVD (Something Weird, 2002)). [Category: Commercial]
This trailer for the gore movie Blood Freak has some genuinely disturbing images in it, but it is undercut by the fact that the killer is a guy in a lame chicken mask. Also, the gore ranges from realistic and stomach-turning to laughably bad, such as at one point where the blood looks like hot pink paint. Some of the scenes make the movie seem just above the level of Monster Kid Home Movies, though with much more disturbing content. Laughable and sick, which is a strange combination.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
The Beatles on Hollywood Palace (downloaded from Bedazzled). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]
No, this is not a live performance––you wouldn’t have been able to hear ‘em over the screams. Instead, the Beatles showed two short promo films for their latest songs, “Penny Lane,” and “Strawberry Fields Forever.” These are basically music videos before there were music videos, and they’re mildly trippy and psychedelic. As usual, the host doesn’t know how to respond to them, though the girls in the audience do. A blast from the 60s.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Children in the City (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Public Service]
This 1970 film documents a federal initiative to fund recreational programs for inner-city children, showing how the money was spent in various cities. The funded programs included camperships for low-income children to go to summer camp, field trips, longer swimming pool hours, schools staying open during the summer to provide recreational activities, arts and crafts programs, athletic programs, and portable recreation vans to bring various forms of recreation, including dances and swimming pools (yes, portable swimming pools) to different impoverished areas of cities. These all look like laudable programs, and one wonders if they continue today. The film is pretty straightforward, with few surprises, though it does have a very bad folk music theme song (and I love folk music).Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Atomic Vignettes (downloaded from Open Source Movies). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]
Amusing short montage film in which clips from various 50s social guidance films are combined with civil defense footage in ways that give new meanings to the clips. Most amusing is a scene where the nice young man from Are You Popular? is made to ask an emergency mechanic for a date. This is the sort of thing I like to see being done with Prelinger Archive footage.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
The Dream That Wouldn’t Down (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: News]
This NASA film is a documentary about the life of Robert Goddard, the pioneering rocket researcher without whose work the space race wouldn’t have been possible. The film contains lots of archival footage of Goddard’s experiments, and was mostly narrated by Goddard’s wife, who seems to be a very intelligent woman. Still, the film ends up rather dry and tedious, which is a pity, because Goddard is such an important figure in the history of aeronautics and space travel. Part of the problem is that this was digitized in such a way that you can hardly hear the soundtrack, but still, I wish this had been a little livelier.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Discovery (available in the 1960s section of the ITV section of the Schools TV section of TVArk). [Category: Educational]
Now this is sex education! This clip from an early 60s British educational TV show features a clipped British narrator and a huge electronic model of a sperm cell that the guy on the program spent a lot of time and effort to make. It’s really cool, actually, and I disagree with the writer on the website who says it was fortunate that computer graphics replaced this sort of thing. Of course, this is definitely an item for the Film Ephemera Museum of Quirky Devices.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.
Allies Win Myitkyina Airstrip (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
WWII newsreel that documents the taking of an important Burmese airstrip by the Allies. Also included are stories on US servicewomen touring Egypt after active duty, fighting in Normandy (including some scenes of shells with messages written on them, such as “Happy 4th, Adolph”, and the taking of Saipan. This is a very ordinary wartime newsreel, but it has historical value.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
The Falling Wall ["Demolition d'un Mur"] (film #3 on The Movies Begin, Volume Two: The European Pioneers (Kino Video, 1994). Also, film #6 on Pioneers of the French Cinema (Hollywood's Attic, 1996)). [Category: Early Film & TV]
A construction crew knocks down the wall of a house they're demolishing. The narrator on The Movies Begin tells us that exhibitors used to run the film backwards on this one, causing the wall to "rebuild" itself, which delighted audiences of the time. Hey, what did they have back then, RKOs? An 1895 Lumiere film. The version on The Movies Begin is in much better shape than the one on Pioneers of the French Cinema, plus it includes the backwards version!Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Electric Car (downloaded from the Featured Clip Archive of WPA Film Library). [Category: Industrial]
British newsreel story from the 60s about electric cars, showing two different models and predicting they’ll be all over the place before long. Alas, it was not to be. The cars are cute, though, and so is the car model being used as a paperweight on the car designer’s desk.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
La Cucaracha (film #7 on Side A of Disc #1 of Comedy Classics DVD Megapack (Treeline Films, 2004)). [Category: Hollywood]
This Hollywood-made short tells the story of a Mexican romantic couple who just barely get along, but do a smokin’ hat dance together. The woman is in a snit because a big theatrical promoter is threatening to take lover-boy away, but her attempts to prevent this end up making her a part of the show as well. This is only mildly amusing, but the costumes and dancing are pretty good.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
The Bike (available on A/V Geeks). [Category: Educational]
A boy covets his neighbor’s bike. After the neighbor family goes away from home, leaving the bike in the yard, another kid comes over and convinces the first kid to “borrow” the bike for a ride. Later, the second kid breaks the bike in a minor accident and both kids agonize over what to do, while blaming each other. This is a well made and realistic film that simply shows the two kids dealing with the situation in kid fashion. It ends unresolved, probably to spark discussion. Assuming such discussion took place, this was probably one of the more effective “conduct” films out there.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Charge of Boer Cavalry No. 1 (downloaded from Edison Film Archive). [Category: Early Film & TV]
A bunch of cavalrymen wielding swords charge toward us at top speed, but fortunately slow down before they run us over. A demonstration of turn-of-the-century military might. A 1900 Edison film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.
Blood Feast Trailer (extra on Blood Feast DVD (Something Weird, 2000). Also, extra on Blood Freak DVD (Something Weird, 2002)). [Category: Commercial]
If you are shocked and disturbed by viewing red paint and fake body parts, then don’t watch this trailer for the Herschel Gordon Lewis gore flick Blood Feast. Actually, considering how cheap and amateurish Lewis’ films usually are, this trailer is surprisingly well made, though gory as all get-out. The opening warning is mildly campy, though.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Hollywood Victory Caravan (film #6 on World War II Remembered (Diamond Entertainment, 1995)). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
The first five sections of World War II Remembered are standard documentaries of various World War II subjects, but the last section, entitled "Hollywood Goes to War", is a collection of wartime propaganda ephemera featuring celebrities. It starts with this short bond drive film, in which a young L.A., woman who desperately wants to see her wounded G.I. brother in an army hospital in Washington D.C., but who can't get a seat on a train going there, sneaks into Paramount studios to try to talk Bing Crosby into letting her hitch a ride on the Hollywood Victory Caravan train taking movie stars to a big bond rally in Washington. Once in the studio, she gets chased by a cranky security guard just like the one in the Porky Pig cartoon You Ought to Be in Pictures and meets lots of movie stars, all of whom are incredibly nice and anxious to help her. The plot is really just a thin excuse to show several movie stars performing, and lots more making cameo appearances, and to make a bond pitch. It's pretty much what you'd expect, but it gets weird for a moment when Bing Crosby and Bob Hope share a lower berth.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Andy Warhol and Sonny Liston for Braniff Airlines (available on Bedazzled). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]
Sonny has that deer-in-the-headlights look as Warhol babbles on about soup cans in this weird commercial. That one facial expression is worth the whole commercial.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.
Boulder Dam (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Public Service]
OK, so you want to know about Boulder Dam? All about Boulder Dam?? With no detail left out? Then this is your movie––35 minutes of non-stop dam construction, narrated in a breathless fashion. OK, folks, this has lots and lots of historical value in documenting the construction of the dam, but there’s only so much dam dam I can take! Include me out of the next dam movie, at least until I’ve seen a few more Mr. Products and supernatural visitors!Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ***.
Humpty Dumpty (film #8 on The Cartoons That Time Forgot: The Ub Iwerks Collection, Vol. 1 DVD (Image Entertainment, 1999)). [Category: Hollywood]
Humpty Dumpty, Jr. has an adventure of his own as he must defeat the villainous Bad Egg, who has designs on his girlfriend Easter. This eggy melodrama is very cute and funny––I particularly like the concept that when both Humpty and Easter are rescued from boiling water, they end up "hard-boiled". And the egg chorus line is a memorable cartoon image. A good one.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Atomic (downloaded from Open Source Movies). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]
This film features a montage of clips from cold war civil defense films, including Duck and Cover, About Fallout, and newsreel footage of the aftermath of the Hiroshima bombing, while on the soundtrack a slow, soulful gospel song plays. At times, audio from the films plays over the music, which actually works, rather unexpectedly. The film’s simple format works well in conveying its anti-war message. One of the better ephemera montage films I’ve seen.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: N/A. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Debrief: Apollo 8 (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: News]
This NASA film documents the Apollo 8 mission in a less technical and more lyrical form than usual. Burgess Meredith narrates footage from the mission by attempting to grasp a deeper meaning, interspersing his own thoughts (OK, the thoughts of the writers) with quotes from thinkers in a bunch of different disciplines. This ranges from pretty hokey to genuinely touching. The film does give you an idea of the sense of wonder the Apollo missions generated in people during the 60s.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Allied Patrol in Action on Anzio Beach (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
This WWII-era newsreel documents the Allied victory on Anzio Beach after D-Day. Also included are stories on a State Department official’s visit to London, women in the armed services showing off their new uniforms (this is presented like a fashion show), a baby beauty contest among servicemen’s kids (good baby boom footage here), new kinds of snow plows clearing roads in the northwest, a Peruvian admiral being honored at Anapolis, a 7-to-1 win in the Kentucky Derby, and an Australian water carnival. This is a great slice of life from the war years.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Discipline During Adolescence (downloaded from Prelinger Archive). [Category: Educational]
This is sort of a Centron “discussion film” for parents (though it was not made by Centron). Steve’s parents are worried about him because he’s been staying out late every night, neglecting his schoolwork, and generally having a bad attitude about things. Steve’s mom, amazingly enough, wants to deal with this by ignoring it, because this tactic worked with the teenaged son of one of her friends. Steve’s dad is all for punishment, but he decides to try it Mom’s way after she talks him into it. Unfortunately, Steve’s behavior just gets worse, so Dad steps in and lays down the law, grounding Steve for a week and cutting off his allowance. This means Steve can’t take his girlfriend to the big school dance, an end-of-the-world outcome for a 50s teen. So, while the narrator asks us what we think about Steve’s parents, we see Steve looking at the want ads, obviously in preparation for leaving home. Steve’s parents portray the simplistic parenting extremes of total lenience vs. unfairly harsh discipline, but I think that’s supposed to be the point. The fact that it’s more complex than that is strongly implied, making this a more intelligent film than I was expecting. Of course, it would only really be valuable if intelligent discussion and guidance followed, which is not always how educational films were used. The film’s portrayal of 50s teen life is appealingly corny––it could have served as a model for the 70s “Happy Days’ kind of idealized portraits of the 50s.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.
Delegating Work (available on You Tube). [Category: Industrial]
Joe, a factory foreman, has a problem. He micromanages all his subordinates and has no sense of priorities, to boot. Then he wonders why his subordinates are overly dependent and undependable, and why nothing important ever seems to get done. This is another one of those Calvin discussion films that ends unresolved. It’s somewhat less campy, but more believable than the others in the series. One hopes that foremen like Joe eventually got a clue from watching this film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
A Coy Decoy (film #2 on Cartoon Explosion, Vol. 1: The Henpecked Duck/Popeye & Olive Oyl DVD (Front Row Entertainment, 2000)). [Category: Hollywood]
This is one of those Warner’s toons that takes place in a bookstore after hours, only instead of featuring random characters from the books, it features a plot that involves Daffy battling a wolf that tricks him with a wind-up female duck decoy (who, of course, Daffy immediately falls in love with and courts using his best Charles Boyer impersonation). This is not quite as weird as some of the other of the Warner’s bookstore toons, but it’s funny all the same. The politically sensitive will want to watch for an outrageous racist caricature gag near the beginning of the cartoon that was, no doubt, cut for all the prints licensed to TV. The ending charts new horizons in genetic engineering.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Are You Listening? (available on You Tube). [Category: Educational]
An elementary school teacher has trouble getting her kids to “listen and follow directions” (i.e. obey her every command), so she uses her talents in the black arts to turn them into hideous mutant giant ears, while turning herself into an even more hideous mutant giant mouth. Then, if that’s not bad enough, she actually takes the kids out into public in this condition! She tries to teach them the safety rules for crossing the street, totally oblivious to the fact that the kids can’t see, being giant ears. She does eventually change them back at the end and rewards them with ice cream for being cooperative little mutants, which almost makes up for it, but still. I bet this film scared more than a few kids into listening to their teacher!Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.
Champs Elysses (downloaded from Edison Film Archive). [Category: Early Film & TV]
Many horse-drawn vehicles go down the Paris thoroughfare. This has historical value in capturing a scene from before the takeover of the automobile. I especially like the double-decker trolleys. A 1900 Edison film.Rating: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
The Blood Drinkers Trailer (extra on Beast of Blood DVD (Image Entertainment, 2002. Also, extra on Brain of Blood DVD (Image Entertainment, 2002)). [Category: Commercial]
Campy trailer for what looks to be a very cheap Mexican horror flick. The font used in the titles is cool and, of course, bright red. Fans of cheap horror should like this.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Faithful (track #2 on The Origins of Cinema, Volume 4: The Arrival of D. W. Griffith (Video Yesteryear, 1995)). [Category: Early Film & TV]
A rich fellow hits a retarded man with his car, nearly missing running him over. To make up for it, he gives the man money and buys him a new suit of clothes, unaware that he is making a new friend for life. The retarded man, called "Faithful", begins following him around like a puppy dog, causing the rich fellow much grief. After a number of comic mishaps, Faithful redeems himself by saving the rich man's fiancee from a burning building. A mildly funny early comedy. A nice view of Hollywood as it was in 1910 can be seen during a chase scene in the Hollywood Hills. A 1910 D. W. Griffith film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Communal Living (downloaded from the Hippies section of WPA Film Library). [Category: Sleaze & Ousider]
Clip from a 60s documentary about communes, where they are predicted to be the wave of the future. Well, it’s the future now, and it didn’t seem to come true in any big way, but bits and pieces of it did, such as diminishing sex roles and organic food. This clip has some great footage of hippies engaging in communal life, giving it historical value.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Alabama Highlands (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Public Service]
This 30s film profiles the state parks near Birmingham, Alabama and shows the work of the Civilian Conservation Corps in improving them. Although there’s nothing truly surprising about this film, it’s very enjoyable to watch because there are many interesting visual moments, both in terms on scenery and in terms of seeing lots of things you’re not likely to see today. In fact, this film goes way off of the historical interest scale, because it’s just so 30s. You really get a sense of the time period from this film. I especially love the title cards with their 30s graphic design. If you’re researching Alabama during the 30s, or the CCC, then this is definitely the film to watch. Also, it’s just plain well made and visually interesting.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****+. Overall Rating: ****.
Hollywood Canteen excerpt (film #9 on World War II Remembered (Diamond Entertainment, 1995)). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
An excerpt from a short film about the Hollywood Canteen, a social hall in Hollywood run by the movie industry for service members. Anybody in uniform was admitted free to the canteen, which was usually packed to the gills with Hollywood stars volunteering their time. Dinah Shore narrates the film, which seems to be a filmed tour of the canteen, giving the G.I.s who couldn't make it a little taste of what they were missing. An interesting historical record of something that probably couldn't exist today, war or no war.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Aim for the Head (available on You Tube). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]
This bit of altered ephemera combines footage from Night of the Living Dead with footage from 3 Stooges shorts to make an instructional film on how to survive a zombie attack. Mainly this involves showing the Stooges’ various pratfalls as strategies for battling zombies. This is actually funnier than it sounds, since the title cards that drive the film are genuinely amusing. The overall premise is quite amusing and that helps.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
America in Space: The First Decade (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: News]
This NASA film from the late 60s documents and celebrates the first decade of NASA accomplishments, including unmanned space exploration, the building and launching of satellites for many purposes, aeronautic breakthroughs, and the research leading up to putting a man on the moon. It does this with very annoying narration that constantly talks about Man and His achievements in space. Other than that, it’s a pretty interesting film, with lots of striking images of space technology. Especially striking is a mildly trippy sequence showing the wide array of jobs involved in manned space flight, consisting of brief clips of all kinds of jobs, with only the sounds of the work on the soundtrack. There’s also an interesting sequence on NASA’s failures, including a bizarre-looking craft that fails in the air and crashes, and a rocket that blows up spectacularly. The film has historical interest in documenting how NASA viewed itself just before Apollo 11. All in all, this is an interesting film that’s fun to watch, though I do wish they would get off of this “Man” kick after awhile.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
House Cleaning Blues (film #16 on Cartoon Crazys: Sci-Fi (WinStar Home Entertainment, 1999). Also available for download on Film Chest Vintage Cartoons). [Category: Hollywood]
Betty Boop has those house cleaining blues, so she calls on Grampy to help with his amazing inventions, and the housework is done in no time. Oh, if housework was only this much fun, the world would be a better place. Also, I want an in-dash soda fountain, like Grampy has in his car.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ****.
Allied Drive on in Italy – Planes Smash Foe in Air (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
This WWII-era newsreel documents Allied progress in Italy, with lots of shoot ‘em up combat footage. Also included are stories on the making of a new transcontinental air speed record by an Air Force pilot, 1300 cadet nurses being sworn in, new army divisions winning medals, crop dusting, and the Allied taking of Hollandia in New Guinea. No surprises here, but there are some striking images of combat and a fair degree of historical interest.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Coal Miner (downloaded from Google Video). [Category: Industrial]
This late-70s film, made by Bethlehem Steel, gives a profile of coal mining as a career. It shows a particular coal miner at home, at work, and in the community, letting him speak in his own voice about how he feels about his job, and about being a coal miner. Mostly, it’s very positive feelings about following in his father’s footsteps, making a good living and providing for his family. Later in the film, his fellow miners also talk about their experiences with mining, and again, it’s mostly very positive. Unions are not mentioned, risks are downplayed, and miners are shown living comfortably with their families in nice houses, implying good wages. Of course, this is what you’d expect by a film made by the Company. Still, the miners speak in their own words, and you get a feeling of sincerity from them, which makes the film at least somewhat believable and very interesting to watch. Most surprising is a scene of the miners cleaning up after work in a gang shower and engaging in very mild horseplay. The whole film seems pretty sanitized, yet enough sincerity comes through to make it an interesting portrayal of the life of coal miners during the late 70s.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Dinner Party (in the Ephemeral section of Open Video Project. Also, film #430 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Educational]
Stiff, stilted manners film from the 40s featuring teens having a dull, lifeless dinner party, and the narrator reading their thoughts, most of which consist of worries that they are not doing everything absolutely 100% correct. The constant implication is that any manners gaffes, no matter how small, have the potential to totally ruin such a party, even though the narrator takes pains to deny this. Other implied contradictions include the narrator repeatedly asserting that the rules of etiquette have logical reasons behind them while never even once giving such a logical reason and further implying that even logical behaviors are forbidden if they’re not “correct”, and the assertion that being perfect in one’s manners increases enjoyment for everyone despite the fact that the both the hosts and the guests of the party are constantly worrying about whether they are doing things right or not. Simmel-Messervey seemed to have a talent for producing “manners” films that exposed the dark side of 40s and 50s middle-class conformity. Their masterpiece in this is A Date with Your Family. This film shows that even outside of the family, the straightjacket of conformity was tightly bound.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
La Bamba (downloaded from Bedazzled). [Category: Hollywood]
No, this is not Richie Valens, but a Mexican Scopitone that does the song in a more traditional fashion, with a female singer and two mariachi guitarists. No real surprises here, but this is lively and fun.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ***. 0verall Rating: ***.
And Then It Happened (downloaded from Google Video. Also available on You Tube). [Category: Educational]
We’ve come a long way from the 50s, kids. By the 70s, educational filmmakers had abandoned the “we just love being safe and following the rules” approach to safety films in favor of the scare approach. So this school bus safety film for junior high kids was based on the driver’s ed scare model, though perhaps not quite as gory. It tells the stories of two different bus accident caused by kids acting up on the bus. The kids are very realistic and extremely obnoxious, requiring the drivers to stop every few minutes to put out cigarettes, remove dogs, stop fights, and, in one case, to summon police to take a sick kid who had been popping pills to the hospital. You’re surprised that enough driving takes place to cause an accident, but the accidents eventually happen when the kids’ behavior becomes even worse. These dramatizations are portrayed with little narration, and the inevitable accidents are shown in lurid slow-motion. I suppose, if anything, this film prepared its junior high audience for the gory scare films they would later see in driver’s ed class in high school. This also qualifies as a scare film for anybody who was in junior high during the 70s, as it’s bound to bring back unpleasant traumatic flashbacks. And like watching most accidents, it’s extremely unpleasant, but you can’t tear yourself away.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: $$$$.
Champs de Mars (film #59 on Edison Film Archive. Also, film #4 on The Mechanized Eye disc of Unseen Cinema DVD Boxed Set (Image Entertainment, 2005)). [Category: Early Film & TV]
A whole lot of nicely-dressed turn-of-the-century people walk down a Paris street, and Edison’s camera captures them in a panoramic sweep. This is a great snapshot of a particular place at a particular time. A 1900 Edison film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Blood Bath Trailer (extra on Monster-a-Go-Go/Psyched by the 4-D Witch DVD (Something Weird, 2002)). [Category: Commercial]
Campy, lurid trailer for the 60s AIP horror flick Blood Bath, featuring a deranged artist/serial killer. What does it say about our culture that we seem to equate the artistic temperament with homicidal mania? Or maybe it’s just an AIP thing. At any rate, this trailer is mildly campy, but not very surprising.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Factory on Film (track #4 on Who Built America? CD-ROM (Voyager, 1993). [Category: Early Film & TV]
This excerpt from one of the first industrial films shows us the Westinghouse Air Brake & Electric Motor Company's huge Pennsylvania plant. Huge motor parts predominate as well as turn-of-the-century female factory workers. An interesting brief glimpse into the Industrial Revolution. A 1904 Billy Bitzer film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
The Clash on Rock Revolution (film #58 in the Video section of Bedazzled). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]
The Clash rock out “I’m So Bored with the USA” and “London’s Burning” in this televised concert footage. You can barely hear them sing over the screams of the crowd, but they project so much energy it doesn’t matter. A great punk relic.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
National Drinking Game PSA (film #31 on AV Geeks). [Category: Public Service]
Middle-aged people at a wild, drunken party are seriously bummed out by the National Drinking Game, which is actually an assessment test for alcoholism. From the looks on their faces, I’d say most of these partygoers are alcoholics, which is no surprise, frankly. Would that it be so easy to break through denial in real life.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Holiday Greetings, 1941 (recorded off of Turner Classic Movies). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
Lewis Stone extends heartfelt holiday greetings to the boys over there. Since this is a theatrical short designed to be shown over here, it's hard to know whether or not they got the message.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.
Antipode Polychromasia (film #3 on Open Source Movies). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]
This experimental film is similar to Anomalies of the Unconscious, involving exposed film that has been hand-colored and altered to create abstract images. Again, this has beautiful abstract imagery and a haunting soundtrack which seems to match the imagery perfectly. Another mesmerizing experimental film.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ****.
Fight Rages on Wallace Appointment (film #185 on Universal Newsreels). [Category: News]
40s newsreel reporting opposition in Congress to the appointment of Henry Wallace as head of the Commerce Department. This is typical political wrangling and speechifying. Also included are stories on the need for more WACs to assist nurses in army hospitals, military and diplomatic bigwigs visiting various places, a fire at a navy pier, a father of triplets inventing a device that gives them their bottles simultaneously, and the invention of a new buzz bomb. The WAC story has some interesting footage of nurses which may have been taken from another film, and the baby-feeder story is pretty silly. Other than that, this is a very ordinary 40s newsreel.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.
Blast Berlin by Daylight (film #100 on Universal Newsreels). [Category: Military & Propaganda]
This wartime newsreel documents the first Allied air raids over Berlin. Some great footage of pilots bantering in front of their decorated planes is shown. Also include are stories about the humane treatment of German prisoners of war in the US, Brazilian fishermen retrieving rubber from a sunken German ship, Mrs. Roosevelt and Mrs. Douglas MacArthur making goodwill trips, a successful air raid on Saipan, and the St. Patrick’s Day parade in New York. This is a great wartime newsreel that gives you a good snapshot of different happenings during the war years. Unlike most of the WWII-era newsreels on the Universal Newsreels site, this is very well preserved.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
The Hoose-Gow (film #3 on Monsters We've Known and Loved (Creepy Classics)). [Category: Hollywood]
This early silent Laurel & Hardy short features the pair getting sent up the river to the big house. We feel sorry for them, but we should feel sorry for the prison––after all, there's no bad situation L & H can't make lots worse, and they do in their inevitable slapstick fashion. It all ends with a big rice-glop fight (it's a long story). What this has to do with monsters, I don't know, but it's lots of fun.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Easy Does It! (film #14 on Cultoons, Vol. 1: Ads and Oddities DVD (Thunderbeam Animation, 2004)). [Category: Industrial]
Joe loves Ann. Ann loves Joe. Joe and Ann want to get married. Problem: Ann’s father’s grocery store is failing, and the mortgage holder, evil Mr. Squeeze, is threatening to foreclose on it unless Ann agrees to marry him. Joe, who works as a stockboy in the store, believes that all is lost until Easy, the Stokely-Van Camp sprite, visits him and shows him how he can increase the store’s profits by stocking Stokely-Van Camp products instead of the UK (Unknown) Brand of canned goods the store had been trying to sell. This animated film for grocery store owners is a true delight. It has just about everything I like to see in an ephemeral film: a supernatural sprite character who comes to help out the main character, singing and dancing food items, housewifey footage, and lots of scenes of 40s grocery stores and grocery products in glorious, garish color. Highlights include the UK canned goods coming to life to try to lure a customer into buying them (they are unsuccessful), Easy taking Joe to visit the gods of rain and sun, the Stokely Man showing Joe a non-animated ephemeral-film-within-an-ephemeral-film, and a delightful scene of singing and dancing tomatoes being canned on a production line. The film has been beautifully restored so that you can enjoy its garish colors in all their glory––the scene of a huge bin of redder-than-red ketchup bottles will practically blow the color rods in your eyes. A classic of ephemera that gets an easy 5 stars.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.
A Cowboy Needs a Horse (film #6 on Disc #2 of Disney Rarities DVD (Disney, 2005)). [Category: Hollywood]
In this 50s cartoon, a small boy has a dream about being a cowboy and fighting various bad guys. This is a charming toon made in the 50s modern style, with no dialogue, just the title song on the soundtrack. I particularly like the beginning sequence, where a giant pencil draws all the things the boy needs to be a real cowboy (horse, rope, spurs, etc.), as well as the ending, where the items are all erased in turn. A great example of 50s modern style animation.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Caltrans Photolog Sample (film #6 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Educational]
You may find this silent driving footage to be oddly familiar-looking if you took driver’s ed in high school. That’s because this is film from the driving simulator, circa mid-80s. Only it’s as if the person operating the simulator was putting the pedal to the metal. Landscapes, small towns, curvy mountain roads, roadsigns––everything whizzes by at top speed. This has a slightly trippy feel after awhile, especially the curvy mountain roads, which seem to undulate sensually under their own power. Normally, I don’t review films in the educational category that are more recent than 1980, but when I found out that this was a simulator film, I just had to have it in my collection.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
Dining Together (in the Ephemeral section of Open Video Project. Also, film #439 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Educational]
Extremely stiff and cheaply made manners film from the 40s that teaches kids proper table manners for Thanksgiving. They couldn’t afford synchronized sound, so all you hear is cheesy piano music and slow stiff narration, using the collective “we” a lot, such as “We like having good table manners.” Fortunately, this kind of obvious mind-control strategy is a complete washout with kids––otherwise, we’d all resemble the living dead in such films as A Date with Your Family. Brain-deadening.Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.
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Better Reading
Better Reading . Teenager Harold Wilson has a problem—he can’t read for (expletive deleted). So he has to spend all his free time studying ...
