Emergency Exit Promo (film #479 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Public Service]

Short movie theater announcement advising audience members to check out the nearest exits and, in case of emergency, to walk calmly to them, rather than trampling their fellow patrons. With all the movie theater ephemera I’ve collected, I don’t have this one, so that gives it historical value. And the style of it is mildly campy.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Aftermath of a Pie-Eating Contest (film #3 in the Chucko the Birthday Clown section of TVParty). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

This scene from a local LA kid show is very representative of the genre. Chucko helps kids with whipped cream all over their faces to recover from a pie-eating contest. The kids’ responses, and Chucko’s as well, are very spontaneous, making this an excellent example of live tv. Most of these kinds of local shows were never preserved at all, not even by their stations, so this clip is quite rare and historically important. It’s great to see TVParty so carefully preserve these local shows, so we can all have a taste of a bygone form of television.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.

Apollo, Segment 6009 (in the Documentary section of Open Video Project). [Category: News]

In this clip from a NASA film, President Kennedy gives the Collyer Award to the first seven astronauts. This has historical value, but it’s pretty dry.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

Broken Blossoms (film #11 in the Silent section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

This is one of D. W. Griffith's best melodramas. It's the tragic tale of a Chinese shopkeeper who takes in a teenaged girl, played by Lillian Gish, who is the victim of frequent beatings by her brutal boxer father. The shopkeeper gives the girl the first kindnesses she has ever experienced, but it can go on only so long before her father finds out, resulting in a tragic ending. Gish is particularly good as the pathetic Lucy, giving a performance that never quite goes over the top, though other performances do occasionally. Though the tale periodically gets a bit maudlin, the relationship between Lucy and the shopkeeper provides an emotional center for the film that makes it genuinely touching. A 1919 D. W. Griffith film.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: N/A. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

B-61 (film #1 in the 0800072 Developing and Producing the B-61 section of DOE Nevada). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

Brief overview of the B-61 bomb. This has some cheesy illustrated title cards, but little else to recommend it.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

Always Tomorrow (film #8 on Feature Films. Also, film #75 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Industrial]

Coca-Cola bottler Jim Westlake reacts to World War II by going on a long, extended reminiscence, where he tells us all about the troubles he had to deal with in the past, which he solved with good ol’ American pluck, know-how, and faith in Coca-Cola, amen! This is a campy and interesting portrait of the corporate culture of Coca-Cola in the 40s, as well as the more general attitudes of big business at the time. Campiest is probably Jim’s second banana Larry, who whines like Droopy about trifles like war, depressions, sugar shortages, and how they are going to pay their bills. Jim himself is obviously too important to dirty his hands with that stuff––he’s too busy thinking about The Future and how it involves selling more and more Coca-Cola so that the business can grow and grow and grow without end. Absolutely no downside is shown for this unending growth. The film goes on and on about this, grinding its messages of future-thinking and faith in the all-powerful-and-good sugary brown beverage into the ground until you want to scream. Some may find this tedious, but for my money this makes the film a must-see as the ultimate example of corporate religion spouted in an industrial film. Settle down, grab an ice-cold Coke, and watch the show, folks. Soon, at least according to the Onion, it’ll be mandatory!

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.

Hey Folks! It's Intermission Time, Vol. 3 (Something Weird). [Category: Commercial]

My husband got me this one for my birthday because he knows how much I love the spook show promos on Volume 1, and this volume focuses on them, though not exclusively. It's "dedicated to the Southern King of Come-Ons, Donn Davison", who appears in several different guises throughout the tape, mostly as a disembodied head narrating horror movie trailers in an incredibly campy style. The big highlight of the tape, though, is a genuine "sex education" lecture from an "expert" (Davison again), made to introduce a "genuine birth of a baby" sequence from a roadshow exploitation pic, which must be heard to be believed. That and the spook show promos are worth the price of this tape, but you also get a great assortment of the usual snack bar promos, local ads, promos, and public service announcements, including a smattering of World War II propaganda stuff (which I have a special affection for). Another easy five stars.

Highlights:

• More great come-ons from spook show promos: "The Management of This Theatre Cannot Be Held Responsible for Persons Who Faint or Go Berserk During The House of Exorcism!" "Can It Be True That Any Volunteer Will Be Decapitated with a Meat Cleaver?" "See the Beatles Mystically Transformed!" "See Lady Godiva Riding in Mid-Air on a White Horse! (For Those Who Embarrass Easily, Blindfolds Will Be Furnished with Peeking Holes!)" "You'll See Blood-Curdling, Sadistic Surgery!" "The Head of Any Volunteer Will Be Cut Off by a Butcher Knife and Thrown Into the Audience!" "Many Drinks Will Be Produced from Pure Water...Just Name It and Drink It!" "13...14...15 Knives Will Be Driven Through the Head of Any Unsuspecting Person!" "Alive! He's Buried Alive! You Must See to Believe! Look Into the Grave!" "Free! 'My Sin' Perfume to All Girls Who Look Into the Grave and Do Not Faint! (Ambulance on Call for Those Who Do!)" "Tune In! Turn On! Drop Dead!" "We Guarantee Your Goose Pimples Will Get Goose Pimples!" "Don't Take This Lightly! How Are You Fixed for Blood?" "In Case You Pass Out Before Seeing a Complete Performance of This Double Stage-and-Screen Science-Mystery Horror Show, That's Tough!"
  
• BUCKY BEAVER ALERT!! They may be pitching for the American Cancer Society, but my husband swears Harry Hambone and his pet anteater, Schnozz, are relatives of Bucky. Be warned.
  
• Back in the days before the MPAA rating system, all movies were in good taste and suitable for children. Even snack bar promos with a Roman orgy theme. Really. "Wouldn't a hamburger taste great right now?"
  
• This tape contains the best print I've seen so far of my favorite snack bar promo, "Let's All Go to the Lobby".
  
• Check out this exchange from "A Visit from Santa" (I swear I'm not making this up): SANTA: And what do you want for Christmas, little girl? LITTLE GIRL: I want to get married! SANTA: You will, you will! Talk about spook shows!
  
• Bizarre dancing flappers, who look naked from the waist up, but couldn't have been, provide a frame for local ads, including a body shop that actually uses the phrase "You wreck 'em, we fix 'em!"
  
• Great stuff you can learn from the "sex education" lecture: "Most men, through sexual ignorance, build in their wives a hatred and revulsion for the sexual act," "Birth control usually involves the use of buttons, pills, douches, or even harsh acids!" and "The men who know about male menopause live longer, happier, healthier lives, and they outlive the women––the way it was meant to be." But you'll have to buy the books Knowledge for Men and Knowledge for Women if you want to get the scoop on "masturbation––how it can be cured and how it can be detected" or "the eight different erotic zones of passion that were placed on every woman's body for her husband's use."
  

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.

Ask Dad (film #11 on Feature Films). [Category: Hollywood]

Edward Everett Horton stars in this rather turgid early 30s comedy short. He plays a businessman whose college-boy son develops a crush on his secretary. Mild comedy tries to ensue, but fails because the script is lame and the timing is clunky. Horton is great as usual, especially when he dictates letters, but he is wasted in this. He needs a situation that is far more wacky and dialogue that is far more sharp to really shine. Still, he tries his best here, and Horton fans may enjoy this little obscurity from early in his career.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Mystery Night Montage (film #8 on Felix the Cat, Vol. 1 (Video Resources, 1994)). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

Video Resources included this short collage of all different kinds of stuff as a teaser for their other products. There's bloopers, newsreel clips, movie clips, cartoon clips, tv show clips, etc., making this a sort of 5-Minute Ephemera Collection. A nice little extra for the Felix tape.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Castro Defeats U.S.-Backed Dictator Fulgencio Batista (film #2 in the Cuban History section of WPA Film Library). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

Newsreel clip documenting Castro’s takeover of Cuba in a surprisingly objective manner. I’m also surprised at the peaceful evacuation of American tourists. This is a straightforward, important bit of history.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Annie Oakley – Annie and the First Phone (film #15 in the Classic TV section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

This early-50s western series has an incredibly campy opening––how many series do you know that have the chutzpah to shoot their viewers? This is pretty much "The Adventures of Kit Carson" all over again, except the hero is a cowgirl and her sidekick is an annoying kid instead of a womanizing Mexican. In this episode, she foils a land-grabber’s plans to rile up the local Indians so that they will attack the local settlers and persuade them to move, so he can buy up their land. Early telephones and a silly Frenchman work their way into the plot, making it mildly amusing, but mostly this is standard Western fare.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Another White Tornado Spot (film #5 in the Video Vault section of TVParty). [Category: Commercial]

Some clueless firemen fall for the ol’ white tornado gag. I’d forgotten how campy these Ajax commercials are.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Palmour Street (in the Ephemeral section of Open Video Project. Also, film #1128 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]

This 50s public service film shows us the stresses and strains of a typical family, and how the ways the parents handle things affect the children. But with a difference––this family is African-American and lives in rural Georgia. The family portrayed is basically a healthy one, though the parents have some flaws. This is pretty amazing, given how much stress they are under from living in a world of poverty and oppression. In fact, this film stands in stark contrast to the other films being made during this time. Instead of being a happy housewife in a clean suburban home filled with modern conveniences, like, say, in Young Man’s Fancy, the mother in this film does her laundry with a tub and washboard after she gets home from working all day–– something that is not a choice for her, but a necessity, as the family desperately needs the money. In fact, she really wants to be able to stay home with her kids, because her only childcare option for the preschoolers is to leave them with cranky Aunt Esther, who showers affection on the baby while treating the other kids like dirt. Still, she considers herself lucky, because she has a “good man” who works hard, brings home his pay, and showers the children with affection. And you can tell that in her world, that is pretty damn fortunate. The oldest child in the family, a little girl of about 8 or 9, sensibly runs away from a creepy stranger who shouts, “Hey little girl, come here!” but she doesn’t live in the squeaky clean world of The Cautious Twins, or even in the Sid Davis universe, but in a run-down neighborhood that probably has guys like that on every corner, making that interaction seem disturbingly real. The film ends on a somewhat tragic note when the father is seriously injured in an industrial accident. The mother spends a tense night at the hospital, and is finally told by a nurse that her husband will pull through, but you know he was just inches away from death. Still, you know his injury will be very hard on the family, and the film ends like a Centron discussion film, by asking the viewer “What would you do?” if you were in this woman’s place. But there are no easy, obvious answers to that question––it’s all too easy to imagine the family being destroyed by such a stressor. Granted, they do seem to be pretty tough, resilient people, but just how much can any family take before starting to fall apart at the seams? The film is well-made and portrays the family realistically and sympathetically. It promotes the sensible proposition that children won’t be significantly damaged by the occasional family argument or harsh words, as long as they are the exception and not the rule. And although the film takes seriously the responsibilities of parents to bring their children up right, there is an implicit acknowledgement that social factors can make this difficult and can even place limits on the power parents have to give their children a good environment. Racism is not explicitly dealt with in the film––the only scene of what seems to me to be explicit racism is when the white nurse talks to the mother in a simplistic tone one might use with somebody with mental retardation––but the incredible contrast this film makes to the films about white people speaks louder than words about the effects of racism. This is an important film to watch to contrast with the other films on the archive––it gives you the other side of the 50s.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: N/A. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.

FDA Public Service Announcement (extra on The Educational Archives, Volume Four: On the Job DVD (Fantoma, 2002), at the end of the film Barbers and Beauticians). [Category: Public Service]

We are shown several quack medical devices of the type that can be found at the Museum of Questionable Medical Devices and warned to stay away from quack doctors in this PSA. Short, but fun.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Looking Ahead Through Rohm & Haas Plexiglas excerpt (in the Ephemeral section of Open Video Project. Also, film #1 on Our Secret Century, Vol. 1: The Rainbow Is Yours CD-ROM (Voyager). Also, film #872 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Industrial]

Wouldn't our homes be lots better if everything in them was made of Plexiglas? That seems to be the message of this 1950s film. Even a multilayered Plexiglas mural of a modernistic cityscape is shown as vastly superior to a boring old window. The house shown has a great "Home of Tomorrow" feel to it. And everything is in garish 1950s color.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ***.

Cosmetic Surgery (film #11 in the Makeovers, Diets & Fitness section of WPA Film Library). [Category: Hollywood]

Brief newsreel clip about nosejobs. A woman with a nose Streisand would be proud of gets the hump removed, which is a slight improvement. I trust the technology has improved since the time of this clip.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

The Adventures of Murray (film #123 in the Comedy section of Brickfilms). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

Murray is a perky little human skull that hops around and scares all the Lego guys, but he’s just trying to reunite with his body. This seems like the quintessential Brickfilm somehow––it’s just so Brickfilmy. I think it’s the kooky music, though the way the sets are built also has something to do with it. To my mind, this is how things really are in Legoland.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Advance of Health Insurance 1945-1960 (film #176 on Open Source Movies). [Category: News]

More newsreel footage documenting the rise of Medicare and Medicaid. This is much shorter and less interesting than the previous film, focusing mostly on footage of politicians.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

Attack in the Pacific (film #2 on disc #1 of Pearl Harbor: Before and After DVD (Triton, 2001)). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

This film documents the war in the Pacific, particularly the long slow journey of the Navy from island to island, and how they provided support for the soldiers fighting to take each island from the Japanese. This is informative and historically interesting, but it’s pretty straightforward with no surprises. Some of the battle footage is pretty gritty. Fans of battle footage will like this; others, probably less so.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

A Buckaroo Conversation After a Morning’s Work (film #12 on Buckaroos in Paradise). [Category: Industrial]

The cowboys rather tersely discuss problems they had rounding up the cattle. This is definitely a real slice of life in all its gritty glory, no scripts here.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

The Adventures of Kit Carson – Wild Horses of Pala (film #12 in the Classic TV section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

In this episode, Kit and El Torro negotiate with an Indian tribe to buy wild horses on their land for the army, but they have to contend with a traitor in their midst who wants to steal the money the army gave them for the horses and stampede the horses. This is pretty ordinary, but it does have its exciting moments.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ***.

Another Beech-Nut Product, 5-Mint Gum (film #8 in the Saturday Morning Commercials section of TVParty). [Category: Commercial]

60s teens frolic on the beach in this bouncy commercial for Beech-Nut 5-Mint Gum. Very 60s, in that beach-party-movie way.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Olio for Jasper (film #5 on George Pal Puppetoons (Loonic Video)). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]

That scarecrow guy that keeps getting Jasper in trouble wants Jasper to give him his snowglobe, so he tells an incredible sob story about his life. Man, this one is weird and it just keeps getting weirder and weirder as the story goes on. I love the “time marches on” sequences featuring Father Time, but I’ve never seen him on a pogo stick before. That’s just a sample of what I’m talking about here. This is one weird cartoon.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: *****.

Fatal Floor (film #10 in the Public Info. films section of TVArk). [Category: Public Service]

This British PSA discourages housewives from placing throw rugs on slippery, polished floors, lest mishaps occur. OK, folks, I know this is a serious safety issue, but I can’t help laughing when the woman’s son-in-law takes a pratfall offscreen, shouting “Waa!!” as if he had taken Being Hit on the Head Lessons.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Ad Astra (film #55 on Open Source Movies). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

This well-made science fiction short is a bit hard to follow, but it does create a compelling and disturbing mood. It involves a man on a future, dried-out shell version of Earth who manages to arrange to go to a colony planet under false pretenses. Other than that, I’m not sure exactly what happens, though the ending is rather gruesome. Still, the mood created makes you want to view the film over and over and think about it until you get it. It’s technically very well done for a low-budget film posted to Open Source Movies. The music especially is great. This director has some definite talent and potential.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ****.

Advance of Health Insurance 1912-1945 (film #175 on Open Source Movies). [Category: News]

This is newsreel footage with narration documenting the rise of the idea of national health insurance in the United States. Footage from Teddy Roosevelt’s, FDR’s, and Truman’s administration is shown. This is pretty straightforward, with a few interesting images here and there.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Atomic Guided Missiles (film #1 in the 0800052 Armed Forces Special Weapons Project section of DOE Nevada). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

In this short clip from a military film, several different types of atomic guided missiles are shown taking off. If you want some stock footage you can use after a scene of the President pushing the red button, here it is.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Buckaroo Clay Taylor Makes Up His Bedroll at the Black Ridge Camp (film #14 on Buckaroos in Paradise). [Category: Industrial]

We get to see a cowboy make up his bedroll, which consists of many layers, including a sleeping bag and something that just might be a buffalo robe. On the outside is a canvas cover that hooks closed, and then the whole thing is rolled up. It looks heavy. Cows moo in the background.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Beginning to Date.

This Encyclopedia Britannica film is livelier than most EB films, probably because it covers a classic genre: dating. The film features a bunch of junior high school kids going to their first dating party. Unlike most films of this type, the kids seem very realistic––they vary widely developmentally in both physical appearance and emotional maturity, which is typical of this age group. The most entertaining couple is George and Mildred. Although their names make them sound like senior citizens (and they probably are today), George is a classic case of delayed puberty (he looks and talks like he's about 9 1/2, tops) while Mildred is charmingly shy and awkward, as well as being a full head taller than George. The film contains both many moments of realistic junior high behavior (one boy fails to pick up his girlfriend from the bathroom because he's busy playing tag with another boy in the coatroom; the dance floor initially splits into the "boy huddle" and the "girl huddle") and great mstable moments (possible topics of conversation are printed in subtitles above characters' heads; Mildred says "bye" and walks into her house without giving George so much as a handshake). Another classic of the dating genre.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

The Adventures of Kit Carson – Widow of Indian Wells (film #11 in the Classic TV section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

In this episode, Kit and El Torro investigate why a town has been spared the rash of robberies that have infected the territory around it. Lots of skulking in this one, and the ending is somewhat unsatisfying.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ***.

The Alamo (film #5 in the John Wayne & Television section of TVParty). [Category: Commercial]

Trailer for the epic film The Alamo that John Wayne produced and starred in. This is pretty ordinary, but the context provided by the accompanying article makes it more interesting.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

Nudist Fashion Show (extra on The Beast That Killed Women/The Monster of Camp Sunshine DVD (Something Weird, 2001)). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]

In this short, nude women model furs in a nudist camp. I say you can’t have your nudism and fur coats, too. Of course, I don’t buy that this is a real nudist camp, since all the models are slim-waisted, buxom, and have bouffant hairdos and too much makeup. Realism was most likely not the point here, though.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Eyesight When Driving (film #9 in the Public Info. Films section of TVArk). [Category: Public Service]

Standard British PSA urging older drivers to get their eyes checked. They make a valid point that many drivers obsessively check over everything in their cars, but go for years without getting their eyes checked. This is pretty ordinary in execution, though.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: **. Overall Rating: **.

Act Two (film #17 in The Carol Burnett Shows section of TVParty). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

Act two of “Eunice” finds Philip home after publishing a best-selling novel, and finding his family just as dysfunctional and clueless as ever. Anybody who’s ever felt out-of place in his or her family should really be able to identify with this. Again, this is intelligent and funny.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: *****.

Apollo, Segment 6008 (in the Documentary section of Open Video Project). [Category: News]

The digitizer makes another laughable goof-up in this otherwise boring clip about supersonic flight. At least she makes a vague attempt to fix it this time. Perhaps the boss was looking.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ****.

Atomic Bomb Delivery (film #1 in the 0800051 Armed Forces Special Weapons Project section of DOE Nevada). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

This clip features a pilot’s eye view of dropping an atomic bomb. You get to see the bright red button being pressed, the bomb falling, and the huge explosion on impact. Then there’s a rundown of the various kinds of planes that can drop a-bombs. Even though the clip is brief, there’s something disturbing about it that makes it memorable.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Brighter Day in Your Kitchen (film #251 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Industrial]

Ah, now this is the kind of film I love––a cheesy housewife film hawking food products! This film, sponsored by Beatrice Foods, showcases the Beatrice Foods Test Kitchen, which is just like an ordinary 50s kitchen, except it contains a laboratory any mad scientist would be proud of and the women in it get paid to cook. However, in all other ways it tries to be as much like a home kitchen as possible, right down to having Dick York around to be the requisite teenage boy with an appetite like an entire army, who spends his time stealing freshly-baked cookies, crashing the clubwomen’s test luncheon after he’s already eaten a full meal at the workingmen’s test dinner, and hitting up on any teenage daughters the clubwomen drag along to the luncheon. This is really like a filmed recipe booklet (another obsession of mine), containing disgusting-looking meals, Jell-O molds, a housewife in an all-metal 50s kitchen, dinette sets and dishes that fetch high prices on ebay nowadays, and, since its sponsored by Beatrice, an insistence that as many dairy products as possible be served every day. To top it off, there’s a whole section on ice cream desserts at the end, which tipped the star rating to 5 for me, since ice cream is my favorite food. And there’s an incredibly cheesy organ soundtrack. Plus the film is very very mstable. Viewers with tastes different from my own may not like this film as much, but for me, it has everything.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.

Boys Sailing Boats, Tuilleries Gardens, Paris (film #5 on Pioneers of the French Cinema (Hollywood's Attic, 1996)). [Category: Early Film & TV]

Boys in Buster Brown suits sail elaborate and pretty cool-looking toy sailboats in a pond in a public park. This almost looks like a scene from a children's picture book––you expect Madeline to show up eventually.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

The Adventures of Kit Carson – Thunder Over Inyo (film #9 in the Classic TV section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

This is another one of the better Kit Carsons. Kit and El Torro help a little girl with a will to her father’s mine protect the mine from claim jumpers. The little girl is cute, though her acting could be better, but the scenes of Kit and El Torro interacting with her are genuinely touching. And I got really caught up in the story, which takes some surprising twists and turns.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

The Addams Family (film #15 in the Cigarette Advertising on TV section of TVParty). [Category: Commercial]

Bumper from “The Addams Family” that features the Dutch Masters singing their memorable jingle about the joys of cigar smoking. TVParty gets docked 5 points, though, for digitizing this so tiny you can hardly see it.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Nude Ranch (extra on The Beast That Killed Women/The Monster of Camp Sunshine DVD (Something Weird, 2001)). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]

This 30s film features women in skimpy, partially-topless Western outfits playing badminton, ping-pong, and horseshoes, while a male voice sings about chickens. I’m not sure what the point of this is supposed to be. OK, I do know what the point is supposed to be––ogling and female objectification––but this is much weirder in execution than it is in concept.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Expedition and House Burning (in the Educational section of Open Video Project). [Category: Public Service]

Silent footage of natives engaging in a complex cultural practice that culminates in the burning of a grass house. This is obviously one of the “Apa Tani” films, but beyond that, I know little about what’s going on. A woman who appears to be a white female anthropologist appears in this one, but she’s no help. I sure wish I had some context in which to put these striking images of native culture.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: **** (gets docked a star for lack of context). Overall Rating: ***.

Hey Folks! It's Intermission Time, Vol. 2 (Something Weird). [Category: Commercial]

This one is not quite as much fun as some of the others in this series, as it focuses mainly on holiday messages and still ad cards for movies, which are usually pretty dull. Still, it has its moments, and you drive-in and walk-in movie ephemera buffs will still find it a valuable addition to your collections.

Highlights:

• Nominations for the Bucky Beaver Hall of Evil: 1. Opera Night gets in for concept alone. 2. Two Vespas, two twins. Here's where the evil begins!
  
• "Warning to All Sourpusses! Stay Away from This Theatre!"
  
• Hell Is for Heroes stars Steve McQueen, Bobby Darin, Fess Parker, and Bob Newhart. Now that's a cast of exciting people!
  
• Most Selfless Public Service Announcement Award: Goes to a spot urging theatergoers to sign a petition to prevent cable tv from coming to their local communities. The spot calls it "pay tv" and says "soon you may have to pay for tv programs you now get for free." Wasn't it considerate of theaters to protect us from such competitors––oops, sorry, I mean money-grubbing corporate criminals?
  
• Thanks to the selfless efforts of the movie industry, mentioned above, "This Attraction Will NOT Be Seen on TV for at Least 7 Years!"
  
• Security State Bank "Offers Unusual Services: Drive-In Walk-Up Banking and By-Mail Free Parking." That's pretty unusual!
  
• 1954 must have been a terrible year! (You must watch the tape to know what I'm talking about.)
  
• North Bridge Marine Service Co. is on the "East Side of Old Bridge." Got that?
  
• High-Class Entertainment Award: "Monday & Tuesday Nights, 2 Adult Flicks, Must Be 18."
  

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.

Act Three (film #18 in The Carol Burnett Shows section of TVParty). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

In this segment from “Eunice,” Eunice argues with Mama about her own drinking after her divorce. Again, this is well-written and funny. Kudos to TVParty for preserving bits of this little-known special.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Apollo, Segment 6007 (in the Documentary section of Open Video Project). [Category: News]

This clip from a NASA film documents Apollo 16 and 17, the last of the Apollo missions. There’s some rather poorly-preserved footage of men on the moon here. Somebody put a lot of effort into these NASA Air & Space Reports––it’s too bad they weren’t better preserved.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

Atomic Blasts (film #1 in the 0800042 Atomic Blasts – Operations Greenhouse Through Upshot-Knothole section of DOE Nevada). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

The title card says this clip is silent, but DOE Nevada added a peppy version of “The William Tell Overture” to the soundtrack, so you don’t have to experience things blowing up real good in silence. Seriously, these a-bomb blasts produced awesome images.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

The Bright Young Newcomer (in the Ephemeral section of Open Video Project. Also, film #250 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Industrial]

In this training film for office managers, a conflict flares up between Joan, a newly-hired employee with lots of new ideas, and Betty, a long-time employee who designed many of that office’s procedures. Joan has some helpful suggestions about how the filing system could be changed, but Betty resents the upstart’s criticism of “her” filing system, which she thinks “has always been good enough up to now.” The office manager, Mr. Barnes, has to figure out how to resolve the issue, which he allowed to escalate by taking no action up to this point. The film ends without resolution, like the other films in this series, posing the discussion question, “Why is Betty resisting new ideas?” The answer, of course, is that Betty, as well as the other “girls” in this office, has been treated with absolutely no respect, even though the film makes clear that she essentially runs this office. They even admit that she has been there as long as Barnes. Yet she sits at a desk in the office pool, with no more authority than any of the other “girls” (they are always called that) in the office. This leaves her to fight like a junkyard dog over what little she can control––if she allows some young upstart to mess with “her” filing system, then she no longer can claim that it is “hers,” and take complete and sole credit for it. Both Barnes and the narrator of this film have the temerity to act as if this conflict was of no importance, that the “girls” make “mountains out of molehills” and get into spats over “nothing”––even though records management is essentially what this office does, and it’s clear that the “girls” handle all the real work of the department, leaving Barnes to answer “important” phone calls in his private, empty office and sign the occasional form that is brought to him. The real discussion question here, folks, is “Why is this company so resistant to the idea of treating their female employees with respect?” One of the most appallingly sexist films I’ve ever seen, which makes it a great historical document of why the woman’s movement was necessary.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.

MST Scrapbook (Best Brains, 1995). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

Msties won't want to miss this long tape of ephemera from "Mystery Science Theater 3000". The show's history is well-covered, from the pilot on Minneapolis station KTMA to the first Conventio-Con Expo-Fest-a-Rama in 1994. There's lots of stuff you won't find anywhere else, such as scenes from the KTMA pilot, home movies of the Brains building a new set just after getting the contract with the Comedy Channel, and scenes of them writing and taping the Santa Claus Conquers the Martians episode. Highlights include Trace ad-libbing about hanging himself while building the set (and Joel and an intern playing along), and Frank doing a really embarrassing dance number in a tight-fitting leotard during the Conventio-Con (and asking people backstage afterwards, "I didn't look silly, did I?"). Ephemera fans will want to check out a PSA the Brains did for the Red Cross which features them msting some brief clips from a public service newsreel called "Red Cross News". A must for all msties.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.

Cartoons Go to War (A & E Home Video, 1995). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

I was disappointed by this tape when I first bought it because I though it would be a collection of wartime cartoons. It isn't––it's a documentary about the toons made during World War II. As documentaries go, though, it's not too bad, and it does contain tons of clips from wartime cartoons (even some toons made by Disney, which are really hard to find otherwise), animated segments of military training films, and even a few newsreel clips about the toon studios doing their bit for the war effort. It also contains lots of interview footage from directors, animators, and artists of the time period. Still, I wish they had included at least a few complete cartoons.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ***.

The Adventures of Kit Carson – The Trap (film #8 in the Classic TV section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

In this rather unusual episode, Kit and El Torro help a wanted criminal foil a plot to drive his wife and son off of their ranch. This is another one of the better Kit Carsons, with a plot that has some interesting twists and turns. And, amazingly enough, it has El Torro cooking instead of womanizing!

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

The Abominable Snowman (film #4 in the Trailers section of Movieflix). [Category: Commercial]

Letterboxed (nice touch, Movieflix!) trailer for The Abominable Snowman of the Himalayas, that 50s classic of Yetidom. The film is not particularly campy, but this trailer is a real hoot, with over-the-top narration and carefully edited clips designed to appeal to paranoid nutcases. Great fun.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Naked Nudist Trailers (extra on The Beast That Killed Women/The Monster of Camp Sunshine DVD (Something Weird, 2001)). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]

A small group of very campy and cheesy trailers for nudie movies from the 60s. Lots of bare breasts and bottoms are shown, but no male naughty bits. Lots of leering, too. Since there are so few of these, I won’t give away the best moments.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

The Egg and Us (in the Ephemeral section of Open Video Project. Also, film #478 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Public Service]

The “egg” of the title is a nest egg of U.S. Savings bonds. This film tries to attribute the postwar prosperity of the 50s entirely to the Savings Bond program, which is laughable, to say the least. Beyond that, though, this film is a great snapshot of 50s attitudes towards its own time. Postwar prosperity is presented as a natural outgrowth of the American way of life (read: capitalism) and the optimistic idea that it will never end is not questioned. This seems particularly naïve when they talk about inflation. For all that, it’s not very campy, really, but it does give you a good look at the 50s mindset. And it has lots of that 50s cute-style animation, too.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ***.

The Littlest Giant (film #6 on An American Retrospective Through Animation (Moviecraft, 1994)). [Category: Industrial]

The "littlest giant" is the American consumer in this film that once again has corporate America trying to fool the little guys into thinking they have a lot more power than they actually do. This time it's consumer credit which supposedly empowers ordinary people and Makes Life Better for Everybody. Granted, legal consumer credit is an improvement over the loan shark (played by a Snidely Whiplash wannabe), but anybody who's struggled with a massive credit card debt can tell you that all this credit is a mixed blessing, and this is not even dealing with broader issues such as the environment or who gets the shaft during an economic downturn (the little guy, usually). The 50s "cute" style animation reminds me of the "Live Better Electrically" spot, which is always an advantage in my book.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ***.

The Acrobat’s Journey (film #42 in the Drama section of Brickfilms). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

I don’t know…I don’t think the Chinese proverb “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” provides enough plot for an entire movie. The cinematography and music are nice, though.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ***.

Apollo, Segment 6006 (in the Documentary section of Open Video Project). [Category: News]

This brief clip features President Nixon arranging for the joint U.S.-U.S.S.R. space mission, and preparations for Skylab. There’s some historical value here, but not much else.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

Cookin' with Gags (film #13 on Cartoon Crazys: Sci-Fi (WinStar Home Entertainment, 1999)). [Category: Hollywood]

Popeye and Bluto go on a picnic with Olive Oyl. It's April Fool's Day, and Bluto takes every opportunity to torment Popeye with April Fool's gags, until Popeye finally gets revenge. This is a pretty standard Popeye cartoon, though the gags are mildly amusing.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: **. Overall Rating: **.

ASROC (film #1 in the 0800044 U.S. Navy Training Film section of DOE Nevada). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

Brief introductory clip from a navy training film about ASROC surface-to-air missles. Includes a bit of that primitive animation so common in military films.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

Breakfast in Camp (film #11 on Buckaroos in Paradise). [Category: Industrial]

Rancher Les Stewart wakes up his ranch hands well before dawn with a yell that could wake the dead, which was probably necessary at that ungodly hour of the morning. The hands, none of whom are morning people, stumble into the cook shack, mumble “Mornin’” to each other, and proceed to gobble down their breakfasts without further comment. I don’t care how many Westerns you’ve seen––this is what it’s really like to be a cowboy!

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.

The Adventures of Kit Carson – Singing Wires (film #6 in the Classic TV section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

In this episode, Kit foils the attempt of a corrupt cattle buyer to start an Indian war. This is by far the best Kit Carson I’ve seen so far. It actually builds up quite a bit of suspense. The portrayal of the Indians, though somewhat stereotyped, is not as bad as you’d expect for the time period it was made. In particular, Kit knows the differences between different tribes, instead of lumping all Indians together, which is surprisingly enlightened for the 50s. This is one Kit Carson to see. El Torro is even shown to fail miserably in his womanizing attempts!

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Bee City (in the Ephemeral section of Open Video Project. Also, film #193 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Educational]

This is like Ant City, only about bees. It's a little more interesting than the other film, probably because bee life is somewhat more interesting than ant life. Like the other film, though, it has a questionable narrator who sounds like he's winging it. And he never tells us exactly how honey is made, which to my mind is missing the point. Mostly, though, this is an average nature film with slightly weird narration.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ***.

ABC Was Still the One in 1977 (film #20 in the Fall Season Jingles section of TVParty). [Category: Commercial]

Long network promo from the 70s, done to the song “Still the One”. This is pretty well-done and memorable, especially the beginning, which features clips from ABC shows from the 50s to the 70s. I also find the song to be pretty catchy. This will definitely bring the 70s rushing back to you, so be warned.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.

Murder in Harlem (film #23 in the Black Culture section of Movieflix). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]

This very primitive 1935 movie for African-American audiences features a black lawyer and novelist who helps out a young woman whose brother was charged with killing a white secretary in the chemical plant where he works as a nightwatchman. The script has some interesting ideas, and deals with issues such as sexual harassment in the workplace, racist treatment of African-Americans by police and the courts, and domestic violence, that were usually swept under the rug back in the 30s. But the story is turgidly told and the acting is uniformly awful. It also has that stagey feel of early talkies, though it was made in 1935. It’s too bad, really––this could have been a really great film if it had been more competently done. It does deserve some commendation for inserting some actual plot development into the obligatory nightclub scene.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ***.

Education Is Good Business (film #477 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Public Service]

This film, made by the National Chamber of Commerce, tries to sell the idea that education is good for business. A high school girl who studies art might grow up to be a housewife who has a taste for “the finer things in life,” a boy who learns better farming techniques in high school will eventually run a farm that has better yields, and a girl who takes a typing class in high school will be able to find a good job after graduation and thus have more spending power, at least until she finds a good husband. Communities that support education sell more magazines! Though I agree that higher education levels tend to improve the economy, there is something incredibly lame about this film and its tendency to reduce people to “tax-supported community assets.” I shudder to think what kind of education the people responsible for this film would like to support. The more you think about this film, the more appalling it becomes. But mostly, it’s just dull and poorly-made, which frankly doesn’t reflect well on the education of the filmmakers.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Abducted (film #10 in the Comedy section of Brickfilms. Also, film #5 in the Drama section of Brickfilms. Also, film #1 in the Horror section of Brickfilms. Also, film #3 in the Sci-Fi section of Brickfilms). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

This film blows the lid off of the whole alien abduction of Lego men conspiracy. And it’s very well-made, suspenseful, and funny to boot. This is one of the best Brickfilms I’ve seen––it showcases what can be done with the medium.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ****.

Apollo, Segment 6005 (in the Documentary section of Open Video Project). [Category: News]

Brief clip from a NASA film highlighting aeronautical research in wind tunnels. Unfortunately, there are no soundtrack woes here, but some of the visuals are kind of unusual.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ***.

Amchitka Program (film #1 in the 0800038 The Amchitka Program section of DOE Nevada). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

Brief clip from a film documenting an atomic bomb test on Amchitka Island in the Aleutians, near Alaska. The film claims that the explosion caused minimal damage. As usual, I’m skeptical.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

Bridge for the Yaque (film #248 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Industrial]

Boring film about building a bridge in the Dominican Republic. Those who are really into bridge-building might enjoy this, though, as the process is described in detail. And since the film was sponsored by U.S. Steel, no opportunity was missed to point out how strong and what a great material in general the steel used to build the bridge was.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

The Boy Detective (film #9 on The Origins of Cinema, Volume 3: The Films of American Mutoscope and Biograph Mature (Video Yesteryear, 1995)). [Category: Early Film & TV]

A plucky newsboy brings two guys to justice (for what crime is not made clear) by, among other things, skulking about, sending another guy to check up on them, and, oh yeah, dressing up in drag. Strange? Uh-huh. Gives new meaning to the word "mature". Oh yeah, and that gun he's playing with at the end is really only a cigarette holder––be sure to try that one at home, kids! A 1908 Biograph film.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ****.

Hey Folks! It's Intermission Time, Vol. 1 (Something Weird). [Category: Commercial]

Drive-in movie snack bar promos––I love 'em. They're some of the cheesiest and most ephemeral of all film ephemera. I even loved them as a kid going to the drive-in for real––I often found them to be more interesting than the movie and would be disappointed when my parents would turn off the speaker during intermission. I love the "Intermissions" that Sinister Cinema puts on its Drive-In Movie Double Feature tapes and always wished I could find a whole tape of this stuff. Imagine my delight when I found this tape in the Movies Unlimited catalog! 90 minutes of nothing but drive-in ephemera, and it's only Volume 1! There are five other volumes in the series! I thought I had died and gone to film ephemera heaven! The tape does not disappoint––it's chock full of all kinds of drive-in paraphernalia: snack bar promos, public service announcements ("Go to church Sunday", "Show an interest in local Boy Scout activities"), timers, holiday greetings, announcements of special shows and promotions, cheesy ads for local businesses, and the highlight of the tape––a bunch of promos for live spook shows that are extremely campy! Highly recommended.

Highlights:

• We are reminded to get regular check-ups and to be x-rayed frequently by title cards with backgrounds that look like fresh meat. Uh-huh...
  
• Disembodied heads are big fans of ice-cream bars!
  
• Back in the 60's, when Honda was best known for making cute little motor bikes, they decided to market their cute little bikes to farmers and ranchers by means of a drive-in commercial. So we are treated to scenes farmers and ranchers buzzing around their acreages and herding livestock on cute little Honda motor bikes. Thanks, Honda!
  
• It doesn't get any more 60's than a snack bar promo done in the style of Yellow Submarine. Groovy!
  
• Santa and the following merchants wish you a happy holiday season: Denison Redi-Mixed Concrete, Farmer's Elevator Mill, Cronk's Cafe, John Rattenborg Produce, B & M Motors, Schlitz Standard Service, Johnson Drug––Veterinary Dept. (only the Veterinary Dept.), and Witt Hardware.
  
• Denison Readi-Mixed Concrete is "so easy to work with, leaving no muss about the place when the job is done." I never knew that about concrete.
  
• Believe me, the spook show promos on this tape are great! It's good that this obscure slice of pop culture has been preserved. These promos make the Godzilla trailer look tame! Here's just a small sample of the outrageous claims made by these live shows (I swear neither I nor Dave Barry are making these up!): "See a Man Buried Alive!" (volunteers are solicited for this), "We Will Not Be Responsible for: Your Hair Turning Grey, Broken Suspenders, Frantic Wives, or Lost Sweethearts!", "A Human Being MURDERED before your eyes!", "Beautiful Girls Sacrificed to the Blood Lust of Inhuman Monsters!", "Maybe Your Tongue and Eyes Will Be Ripped Out!", "All Undertakers and Grave-Diggers Admitted Free!" "Humans Turned Into Zombies!", "Monsters Grab Girls Out of the Audience!", "Invisible Man Terrorizes You!", "Slave Maidens at the Mercy of Hideous Beats!" "The Devil, in His Wildest Flights of Fancy, Cooked Up These Fantastic Tricks to Baffle You and Frighten You!", "Don't Be Chicken! Show That Gal Friend You Got What It Takes!", "This Theatre Reserves the Right to Stop the Show Anytime It Becomes too S-C-A-R-Y!", "You'll See Human Sacrifices!", "Monsters Cut Off Girls' Heads!", the most incoherent: "You'll See a Blood-Curdling Space Monster Who Died, Yet Alive, Will Come to Seek the Warm Blood He Needs to Keep Himself Alive!", and the most unbelievable: "Even Scarier than Advertised!!" Two different shows make this exact same word-for-word claim: "Positively Never Here Before! Brand New!"
  
• Msties, take note: Dr. Macabre's Frightmare of Movie Monsters features the Colossal Beast (as in War of...) alive! In Person!
  

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.

Casper, the Friendly Ghost (film #3 in the Xmas TV section of TVParty). [Category: Hollywood]

Clip from the beginning of an old Casper cartoon, A-Haunting We Will Go. Fortunately, it ends before things get too sappy.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ***.

The Adventures of Kit Carson – Road to Monterey (film #5 in the Classic TV section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

In this episode, Kit and El Torro help a state senator get to Monterey despite the machinations of the senator’s political rivals. I’m beginning to see a pattern here in things like bad guys starting fights in order to distract Kit (something he always falls for), Kit and El Torro guarding hotel rooms only to have the abduction take place through the window, and the Hispanic female proprietor of the hotel being in league with the bad guys. The formula must have been pretty strong to be detected after only three episodes.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

ABC Was in the Mood to Celebrate (film #21 in the Fall Season Jingles section of TVParty). [Category: Commercial]

Late 70s ABC network promo containing brief clips from the hit shows that made them number one. Should bring back those 70s tv-watchin’ memories.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Moon Over Harlem (film #22 in the Black Culture section of Movieflix). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]

A young woman from Harlem experiences many troubles when her mother marries a gangster. This was directed by cult director Edgar G. Ulmer, and it shows. There is a dark, gritty, tragic feeling about the proceedings, even though the film ultimately ends on a hopeful note. All the characters struggle in one way or another with poverty and hopelessness, and although this is never explicitly stated, the connection of this to racism is obvious. This is also one of the more realistic and less stereotyped of the all-black cast films. I bet African-American audiences of the time really identified with this one.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: N/A. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

MST Poopie (Best Brains, 1995). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

This blooper reel from "Mystery Science Theater 3000" is a lot more fun than most blooper reels, and I don't just say that because I'm a mstie. The Brains are very creative people and it shows on this tape. They don't just curse when they blow a line or a piece of set falls over––they use it as an opportunity to ad-lib wildly, and some of those ad-libs are funnier than the original script. Also, the puppet handlers often remain in character as their puppets, so it doesn't so much look like Trace or Kevin blowing a line as it does Crow or Tom Servo. Highlights include Joel blowing his single one-word line in the "funny thing with Cambot about waffles", an intimate moment between Morrisey and Dr. Forrester, and Kevin Murphy as a giant leech asking a constantly cracking-up Frank, "Is it my sucking?" Lots of fun.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ****.

Education for Excellence (film #475 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Public Service]

This early 60s film about educating gifted students in New York City does nothing to dispel the geek stereotype, unfortunately. Most of the children are very nerdy, and some even project a bit of smugness. Most of the teachers are pretty nerdy, too. The film goes on and on about how the program is developing critical thinking abilities in the kids, but when the kids open their mouths, they recite memorized passages in such a stilted fashion that you doubt they really understand anything about them. The film should bring back lots of memories, mostly unpleasant, for people who went to elementary school during the 60s, and it’s very mstable, especially the shots of kids who don’t know their being filmed, and the incredibly nerdy principal with aerodynamically sound ears.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

ABC Movie of the Week #2 (film #29 in the Fall Season Jingles section of TVParty). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

Incredibly loud and bombastic intro to an “ABC Movie Special”. Remember when viewers actually cared about such things?

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Am I On? (film #2 on News Bloopers DVD (Time Life Video, 1999). [Category: News]

This section of News Bloopers features newscasters who don’t realize they’re on the air. These are pretty darn funny, especially the looks on their faces when they realize they are on the air. This is the kind of gaffe I love seeing as it happens. One of the better parts of News Bloopers.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ****.

Allies Take Rome (film #5 in the D-Day and Beyond section of WPA Film Library). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

British newsreel footage of Allied troops parading through Rome after their victory. Also featured is some mildly disturbing footage of crowds going after traitors and footage of the pope commemorating the Allied victory. Pretty standard, but historically interesting.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: *. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

The Art of Foiling and Frosting Hair (film #9 in the Makeovers, Diets and Fitness section of WPA Film Library). [Category: Industrial]

Excerpt from a 60s training film for hairdressers that explains how hair is frosted and streaked. “Foiling” is a process that involves using actual strips of aluminum foil to hold the bleach on the hair––another use for foil that could have been put into Aluminum on the March. This is actually pretty interesting and the model getting her hair done just screams 60s style.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

Cap'n Cub (film #1 on V for Victory WWII Cartoons & Shorts Show, Vol. 1 (Something Weird, 1996)). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

This cartoon, featuring a cute bear cub pilot, is kind of surreal. It's plot kind of wanders all over the place, but basically it involves Cap'n Cub demanding more planes, supervising an aircraft factory which builds tons of planes so that all the cute forest animals can go fight the Japs, and an air battle with a huge Japanese plane piloted by a Japanese monkey ("No racial stereotypes here!" my husband quipped when he first saw him). Nevertheless, there's some fascinating imagery here, especially the technology of the airplane factory (I want the entire plant for the Film Ephemera Museum of Quirky Devices) and what happens to the monkey's plane after it is shot apart by Cap'n Cub. I bet kids who grew up during the 40s had weird fever dreams about this one.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ****.

The Beatles and Pop Culture (film #8 in The British Invasion section of WPA Film Library). [Category: Hollywood]

Silent newsreel footage shows us some rather fascinating factory footage of Beatle wigs being made. I wonder what happened to the soundtrack to this. Then the sound kicks in and we see the Monkees shamelessly ripping off the Beatles’ media schtick. A fun relic of Beatlemania.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.

Let's Go to the Movies (film #830 on Prelinger Archives. Also, recorded off of Turner Classic Movies). [Category: Industrial]

The Motion Picture Academy made a series of films in the 50s showing how movies were made. This was the first of that series. It gives a brief history of movies and shows us some of the raw materials of film stock. It doesn't go into too much other detail, leaving that for later films in the series. Still, there are some interesting images in this, especially of old-time movie theatres.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Coo Coo the Magician (film #24 on The Cartoons That Time Forgot: The Ub Iwerks Collection, Vol. 2 DVD (Image Entertainment, 1999)). [Category: Hollywood]

While vacationing in Arabia with his girlfriend, Flip the Frog has a run-in with a magician (Flip exposes his tricks as fakes) who kidnap's Flip's girlfriend and sends her to a harem, requiring the obligatory rescue from Flip. Like most cartoons of its time featuring an Arab setting, this features lots of racist Sambo characters as the Arab soldiers and henchmen, which is curious, since black people aren't native to Arabia. Other than that, this is a pretty ordinary Flip cartoon.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

The Adventures of Kit Carson – Desperate Sherrif (film #3 in the Classic TV section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

This is one of the better Kit Carsons. Kit and El Toro help a young sheriff defeat a gang of bank robbers. It has all the standard Western elements of poker games, barroom brawls, chases on horseback, and good guys who outshoot the bad guys. El Torro goes through his usual stereotyped womanizing schtick. Western fans should enjoy this.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

ABC Saturday Morning Lineup Promotion from 1974 (film #26 in the Fall Season Jingles section of TVParty). [Category: Commercial]

I don’t remember any of the cartoons advertised on this. Of course, by 1974, I was 14 and getting too old for Saturday morning tv. But still, these look lame, especially the one about the turn-of-the-century family (probably a Waltons rip-off).

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Marching On (film #20 in the Black Culture section of Movieflix). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]

There is something oddly touching about this wartime film made for African-American audiences. This is one of the least stereotyped films of this type that I’ve seen so far, so that plays into it. It’s sort of an African-American version of This Is the Army, featuring a draftee that has a bad attitude towards the army until he has some unusual experiences when he attempts to desert. The film was obviously cheaply made and there are some excruciating moments of bad acting, bad dialogue, and overly-convenient plot contrivances. But still, unlike many African-American movies of its time, most of the characters seem like real people, rather than racist stereotypes. The patriotism is heavy-handed and thick, but the fact that African-Americans were not treated very well by the country they were supposed to love and defend gives the patriotism a poignancy that is hard to escape. And the film gives you a feel for what it must have been like to be black and in the army during World War II. The whole thing is interrupted in the middle by the obligatory nightclub floor show, which seems particularly arbitrary here, as well as taking up a huge amount of screen time. But, like most of these types of interludes, it’s lively and fairly fun to watch. Overall, this is one of the most interesting and touching of the made-for-black-audiences films I’ve seen.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.

BBC1 Schools: Secondary (film #3 in the Schools section of TVArk). [Category: Educational]

This counter is similar to the Primary counter, but the diamonds completely disappear after awhile, and the soundtrack is blander. Mesmerizing.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

A Citizen Makes a Decision (film #322 on Prelinger Archive). [Category: Public Service]

Homer, an ordinary working-class guy, tries to decide whether or not to vote for a proposed dam project after his town is devastated by a flood. He ends up doing more research about this than the kid in How to Prepare a Class Report. He even goes to the library, which is something the film is careful to point out is unusual for him––he’s no longhaired egghead after all. Despite the many mstable moments in this film (such as the line “Homer was aroused!”) and the fact that the political process is shown to be the exclusive province of white males, the earnestness of this Centron film gets to you after awhile, and you can’t help but agree with its basic premise of thinking carefully and gathering facts before taking a political stand, even if the example shown way overdoes it. Another example of Centron getting away with murder because of its sincerity.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

The Bob Kick (film #1 on More Melies (A-1 Video)). [Category: Early Film & TV]

A pie-hatted, mustachioed "kid" has a little too much to drink. This causes the ball he was playing with to turn into a living human head! Then some other weird stuff happens, which is hard to see because the print is so bad. Still, this is weird enough to be worthy of Melies. What the point of the weird techno-rock sound track is, I don't know, though. A 1903 Melies film.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

ABC Movie of the Week #1 (film #10 in the Fall Season Jingles section of TVParty). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

Opening credits for the popular 70s series of tv movies. This one announces the Western Second Chance, starring Brian Keith, Juliet Prowse, and William Windom, a 70s tv-movie cast if ever there was one. This should bring back lots of 70s memories of mediocrity.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Acts of Nature (film #6 on News Bloopers DVD (Time Life Video, 1999)). [Category: News]

Various forms of nature, such as wind, rain, or insects create blooper moments for newscasters. Most of these are pretty ordinary, but there are some fun moments, and the segment is edited together well. My favorite is when a hornet brings a local newscast to a complete standstill.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: ***.

Able (film #2 in the 0800000 Nuclear Film Declassification Project section of DOE Nevada). [Category: Military & Propaganda]

The fourth atomic bomb blows up real good in this very short clip from an official military documentation film. This one makes a huge hemispherical cloud, rather than the standard mushroom cloud. Lots more of these explosions to come, folks.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Branding, Ninety-Six Ranch (film #18 on Buckaroos in Paradise). [Category: Industrial]

This short film shows the branding process in detail, so it’s not recommended for those who tend to identify with the calf. The calf gets a brand burned into its side, a wattle cut under its chin, an earmark cut into its ear, and several shots, all in the course of a couple of minutes. Fortunately, they only talk about castrating the bulls, rather than showing it. It certainly does not look like any picnic for the calf, but he does seem to recover from it rather quickly, but then what do I know? The film is a good record of cattle-raising practices, though.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: N/A. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Grandpa's Sci-Fi Hits (Amvest Video, 1988). [Category: Commercial]

Al Lewis as Grandpa Munster is at it again, this time hosting a tape of trailers from science fiction movies from the 50's, 60's and 70's. This compilation is a little bit better than Grandpa's Monster Movies––there's a little less of Grandpa and a little more of the trailers and the trailers are little more fun. Most of the trailers are from pretty cheesy movies and the cheesiness comes through in the trailers, making them fun. Unfortunately, being a little better than Grandpa's Monster Movies is not saying much. The film and video quality of the trailers is quite good, though.

Highlights:

• The trailers for the serials Flash Gordon, Flash Gordon's Trip to Mars, and Buck Rodgers have all of the campy fun of the original series with none of the boredom or incoherence.
  
• Alert! The Lost World stars Frosty the Poodle!
  
• This tape gets docked 10 points for listing the trailers on the package in the wrong order, another 10 points for listing trailers which don't appear on the tape, and another 10 points for not listing trailers which do appear on the tape. The following trailers do not appear on the tape, despite the list on the package: The Spider, The Colossus of New York, The Incubus, The Fabulous World of Jules Verne, The Black Scorpion, Attack of the Crab Monsters, Friday the 13th Part II, Dinosaurus, Beyond the Time Barrier, The Mysterians, 5 Million Years to Earth, and They Came from Beyond Space. The following trailers do appear on the tape, despite not being listed on the package: Destroy All Monsters, King Kong (1976), The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Dr. Goldfoot and the Girl Bombs, The Omega Man, Fahrenheit 451, Village of the Giants, Godzilla vs. Megalon, Ghidrah the 3-Headed Monster, Varan the Unbelievable, Reptilicus, and Battle of the Worlds.
  
• Msties, take note: contains the trailers for Village of the Giants, The Amazing Colossal Man, Godzilla vs. Megalon, and This Island Earth.
  

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: **. Weirdness: **, Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

Africa Speaks (film #1 in the Documentary section of Movieflix). [Category: Hollywood]

This memorable adventure documentary from the early 30s influenced many other films to come. It features a pair of white male documentary filmmakers making their way across Africa, filming the wonders of nature and having many adventures along the way. Because it was made during an unenlightened time, its portrayal of the natives and the way animals are treated are excruciating to watch at times. Particularly upsetting are the way they portray the native tribes’ treatment of women, but its hard to tell how accurate this is because the whole film is so skewed in its portrayal of natives. Still, the film is pretty entertaining to watch and has lots of action and wonderful scenes of animal life. And its unenlightened perspective makes it a historically interesting snapshot of popular attitudes towards Africa at the time. Many lesser films would be made according to this mold, so its good to see the original.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ****. Weirdness: ****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: ****.

The Adventures of Kit Carson – Border Corsairs (film #2 in the Classic TV section of Movieflix). [Category: Early Film & TV]

Standard-issue 50s oater in which Kit Carson and his Mexican companion Torro try to prevent a Mexican-American landowner from starting a border war. Torro is a stereotyped womanizer and there are several plot holes, but mostly this is pretty ordinary.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: **. Historical Interest: ***. Overall Rating: **.

ABC Promos in the Sixties (film #4 in the Fall Season Jingles section of TVParty). [Category: Commercial]

Hard-sell 60s promo for the ABC new fall primetime season. This has a cheesiness that is reminiscent of the drive-in snack bar promos of the era.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.

Maniac (Sinister Cinema). [Category: Sleaze & Outsider]

This legendary 30s exploitation flick is one ripe piece of cinematic cheese. It features one of the most over-the-top mad scientists ever, who gets killed early on by his assistant, who just happens to be a down-on-his-luck actor. Fortunately, we are not spared scenery-chewing, as the actor decides to take over the identity of the mad scientist, and shows himself just as capable of over-emoting as his mentor. The film also features scenes of cats fighting, weird montages of a laughable devil and his minions, a gruesome scene of the main character eating a cat’s eyeball, and the obligatory exploitation scenes of scantily-clad women conversing and a fight between two women that involves pulling each others’ clothes off. All of this is passed off as a documentary about mental illness by inserting title cards at random moments that spout psychobabble about various psychiatric diagnoses. For lovers of bad films, this is entertaining from beginning to end, as well as being weird as all get-out.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: *****. Weirdness: *****. Historical Interest: *****. Overall Rating: *****.

Monsters We've Known and Loved (Creepy Classics). [Category: Outtakes & Obscurities]

This tv documentary should please fans of cinematic monsters––it's an affectionate chronicle of them from The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari to The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies. There's not much in-depth analysis here, but there is lots of affection for the horror genre and tons of clips from both famous and obscure monster movies. Those who are not monster movie fans will find it less interesting, but it is a prime example of a mid-60s tv time-filler that local stations would use to plug up holes in their schedules.

Ratings: Camp/Humor Value: ***. Weirdness: ***. Historical Interest: ****. Overall Rating: ***.